Missionary's Missionary

2011-09-08T06:46:00.001-05:00

Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus (I Thess. 5:16).

Our family landed in Holland on July 6th, our son’s fifth birthday, to begin our lives here. It was cold to us. We had been living in Phoenix for a little over a year and 60 degrees seemed quite cool. Presently on September 8th at 11:30 a.m., it is 59 degrees with light rain showers. Right now it is dry. Dry in Holland means rain is not falling from the sky. We always allowed our children to play out when it was dry.
In my latest sojourn in Holland, the past two days have been pretty blustery with highs around 60 and I’m feeling a bit cool. I’m wearing my turtle necks and at night my flannel PJs. Though it is mid-50s during the night and though the temps can climb into the mid 60s during the day, it is still too warm to begin heating the house. That July after we arrived in Holland for the first time, it was impossible to heat our host’s apartment. Central heating was controlled by others. Heat was turned on in October and turned off in April regardless of the weather conditions. That’s the Dutch way.
My kids tell me it’s been a terrible summer here – cool and constant rain. Last Saturday’s unusual heat seems to have been a gift. The summer we moved to Holland it was cool and rainy through July and August. A week into September the sun came out. We had huge picture windows in our apartment in Amsterdam and wide window sills. Our 18th month old, still clad in his blanket pajamas climbed up on the window sill one morning and pointed toward the East and said, ‘wha’s dat?’ I remember my astonishment and gasped, “That’s the sun! Have you forgotten what the sun looks like?”
There are some things you just can’t change. I learned early on that it’s much easier just to accept your circumstances and move on to what you can influence and change. One of things that goes along with acceptance, is acceptance with grace. What has helped me through the years to accept the dark nights that life, without permission, bestows upon us, is to find something – anything – for which I can be thankful. A Dutch woman, incarcerated at hated Ravensbruck for hiding Jews, Bep ten Boom, asked her sister, Corrie, to thank God for the fleas. Reluctantly, Corrie thanked God for the fleas and, as it turned out, the fleas that kept the guards out of their quarters. They were able to conduct Bible studies and prayer times. Thankfulness defeats the evil-one. (I refuse to grace him with capital letters).
Viktor Frankl, who wrote The Will to Meaning and much more, taught me the importance of finding meaning in life. Sometimes you have to search for it, but like ‘thankfulness,’ finding meaning in an unwanted or even wanted event enriches our lives. I think it also helps to look for beauty. Everything can be taken from us except our thoughts. We need to guard our thoughts well for they determine the bent of our life.
Today – on this dark, blustery, rainy day I am thankful for a granddaughter who will be home in moments for lunch, for the bread and cheese and chocolate that will grace our table, for her health, her intelligence, her beauty, for the person she is becoming and the meaning? Grateful for a daughter who is doing everything she can to promote the things the Dutch Bible Society wants to accomplish and for a son-in-love who volunteers weekly at the home for elderly in the village and keeps the house going while working full time. What a joy it is to see your children parent well – better than I ever did. What a gift to be with them again after so long an absence. What a great gift family is!

2011-06-19T11:15:00.004-05:00

"You know that the household of Stephanas were the first converts in Achaia, and they have devoted themselves to the service of the Lord’s people. I urge you, brothers and sisters, to submit to such people and to everyone who joins in the work and labors at it. I was glad when Stephanas, Fortunatus and Achaicus arrived, because they have supplied what was lacking from you. For they refreshed my spirit and yours also" (I Cor 16:15-18)

I just returned from Mission Resource Network's Missionary Renewal Retreat. We had a total of 18 missionaries attend, plus staff. We held the retreat at the Prothro Center on Lake Texoma. The surroundings were beautiful and the accommodations were comfortable. A young chef did his best to make the food tasty and his presentation of the food was attractive. I think everyone, but one disciplined woman who ate no bread and no desserts, put on a few pounds. We were the only group at the center, which made it nice. The Prothro Staff did what they could to make our week special.

Our group was able to worship at lakeside a couple of times in the early morning hours during the retreat. The center had an iron cross and benches near the beach and it was a perfect place to see the sun rise up over the lake. There were ducks and geese and wild turkeys and other wild life. Basil McClure, former missionary in Brazil and a trained spiritual director, led us in worship the entire week. He is an outstanding worship leader. His wife, Rachel, also has a beautiful voice and aided us women as we sang the female parts. We began each morning before breakfast with worship. We ended each day with worship. Lynn Anderson, Director of Hope Network, led us in study every morning. The afternoons were free until 4:00 p.m. Steve Allison, a Clinical Psychologist from ACU and active in missionary care and I offered counseling/coaching/mentoring/pastoral care sessions during the free time. Debriefing groups met from 4 to 6:00 p.m. We then gathered for our evening meal and afterwards spent time in worship. Evenings after worship were free. Some played games; some just sat around on the veranda and talked.

Lynn Anderson’s messages on Talking Back to God by Praying through the Psalms were excellent. He shared from the depths of his soul and all of us were deeply touched, both by his messages and by God’s messenger. I recommend his book by the same title to all of you.

For the debriefing sessions, I divided the participants into two groups for the men and two groups for the women. Each group was staff led. Bob Waldron, former missionary in Guatemala, and Lynn Anderson led a male group and Basil McClure and Steve Allison (a Clinical Psychologist from ACU) led the other male group. Rachel McClure and Gina Waldron led one female group and Carolynn Anderson and I led the other female group. Each person in the each of the groups got to tell his/her story, with special emphasis on the last three years of their lives. After the story teller told his/her story, the other members of the group wrote down the strengths they saw in that person on sticky notes and they pasted them on the story teller, after which the group prayed for the story teller. Because each group promised confidentiality, the groups became very safe places. There was a deep level of sharing and many tears. By Wednesday there was a growing camaraderie, lots of laughter and hugs and general comfortableness among the missionaries. Some great friendships were forged.

After everyone in each group had told his or her story (including staff), I led a debriefing about the debriefing. I did my best not to lecture, but to draw out the discussion from the missionaries and it turned out well. I worried a lot about this, but just two days before the retreat, I remembered how I used the Kolb model when I taught adults at the university. I used this model to lead the discussion and it helped me fill in the gaps by asking critical questions that led to more discussion. The debriefing of the debriefings, because of the wonderful missionary input, was rich and deep.

Among the missionaries, we had six Adult MKs present. Since there were many questions about how to help children with reentry, we put together an unplanned panel of the adult MKs, Steve Allison and myself and we had a great discussion. Good stuff!!!

Lynn Anderson said that this retreat was one of the best kept secrets in the brotherhood. He has become a real fan. It was evident so many times that God’s presence was among us. I am grateful to my Prayer Team, who labored in prayer for this retreat. They are the best!

If you missed this years retreat, God willing the retreat will be held this time next year and furloughing, returned and returned missionaries are invited. Allow us to be Stephanus, Fortunatus and Achaichus to you and refresh your spirits.

2011-05-06T10:06:00.004-05:00

Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise (Ephesians 6:2).

Mother's Day for Missionary Moms is a difficult day. The sermon for the assembly of the gathered saints is focused on Moms and Grandmothers and Great Grandmothers. Often moms are asked to stand and be recognized by the congregation. After corporate worship children take their moms out to eat, but not you. Your children and grandchildren seem a million miles away. Oh, if they know it is Mother's Day in the States, they will call you or Skype you if they can. They may have already sent an email and email card, but you dread the inevitability of the day. It's another tough reminder that your children are missionaries - not that a day goes by that you don't remember.

Mother's Day is the day children are to spoil their mothers. Images of breakfast in bed or the gift of flowers and chocolates play across tv screens. It is subtley intimated that the number of gifts and cards a mom receives, equals how much she is loved. If you are also taken out to eat, you are really loved.

Mother's Day could become a miserable day for you. I don't know if this will help you or not, but this is a way I cope with special days I can no longer celebrate. My anniversary comes up every year, but I am a widow. My son's birthday, like clock work shows up every February, but he has been with the Lord longer than he lived. What do I do with those days? I celebrate them. I invite a friend out for dinner and I pay the bill. On those days, I even order dessert. Those days are very special days and instead of mourning, I rejoice that I was married for 43 years to a wonderful guy who loved me back and that I was allowed to be the Mom to a special son for 21 years. On Father's Day I will see that my son-in-laws get special cards and I will celebrate. My suggestion is that you celebrate this Mother's Day and rejoice that you are a Mom. Invite another Mom who will be alone also and go out to lunch together. Wear a special dress. Give yourself permission to have fun. Look for the people in your congregation who will be alone and be sure you hug everyone of them. Choose not to mope. Look and list things you are thankful for and remember, on the last day, someone may come up and hug you because your son or daughter lived Jesus before them and so they listened to their words about Him. They will thank you for your sacrifice.

It is far better to know that you will spend eternity with your missionary son or daughter than to have them home for Mother's Day this year.

2010-12-31T00:57:00.003-06:00

Philippians 3:13-14
No, dear brothers and sisters, I am still not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us up to heaven. (NLT)

Twenty two years ago today, December 30, surgeons removed a cancerous kidney from my husband’s body. We lived more purposely after that surgery. While he still felt well enough, he continued to teach at York College. Students voted him Teacher of the Year or First or Second Runner Up, 13 times out of his 20 years as a faculty member. During the school year, we had about 30 young people come to our home each week. We would feed them and then, with the rest of the MAP Committee, we would train these students in all things pertaining to missions. These were Master’s Apprentice Students. We often took mission trips in the summer to different places. I was often the cook, sometimes cooking for 40 or 50 people from a closet known as a kitchen. We loved camping. We camped all across Canada – from one end to the other. We camped in the Blue Ridge Mountains, the Rockies, the Cascades, on the coast of California and the coast of Maine and Massachusetts and in all the states in between. We also gardened and cut wood together for our wood-burning stove. We cared for my husband’s aging parents, took care of the farm business matters when they couldn’t, moved them into town, and were there with them in their last moments.

We had a good life together. We worked on our marriage all our married life and were about as happy as any two people could be. We often taught the young married class at church so we could share some of what we had learned. Every year we spoke at an engagement seminar for students called “Fit to be Tied.” We had our hard times, too. As a missionary family we went through culture shock and ongoing culture stress together, then reentry shock and ongoing reentry stress. Our son was killed crossing a neighborhood street in Lincoln, Nebraska, by a young truant teen who was drinking, smoking pot and driving way too fast. Then when York College went through its troubles, we struggled mightily. Such things can destroy a marriage. We determined they would not.

My husband was a good Dad. We camped with our kids all over Europe the 15 years we lived there. He played kick-ball and hide and seek and soccer and catch and drank imaginary tea from plastic tea sets. He read to the kids at night and had a weekly bible study with them – all geared to their age. At night in their pj’s he would romp on the floor with them and carry them upstairs to bed. He taught each one of them to drive a car, a tractor and a riding mower. That man had patience.

My husband prepared me to live independently. When we were courting, he told me that I might be a widow for a long time because of our age difference. I didn’t really believe that then. All I wanted was to be his wife. He encouraged me to study. Even when we lived in the Netherlands, he would make it a point to stay home one evening every week with the children so I could go to continuing education classes. I studied in Dutch and wrote papers in Dutch. I studied the arts and music and literature and history. I took German, French and Castilian Spanish. When we returned to the states I finished my degrees and when I began my doctorate, he joined me and we were in stat and research classes together at the University. We wrote our dissertations at the same time and did our research together. It made for great conversations. My husband encouraged me professionally - to branch out into areas I wouldn’t have ventured without his encouragement. He was my cheerleader. And he was my advocate.

Before I met my beloved, I prayed often that God would give me a husband who loved Him more than He would love me and who would allow me to love God more than him. God answered that prayer and as it turned out, loving God first increased our love for each other. God was wrapped up in everything we did. What I miss more than anything are our talks about scripture, the word studies, finding the meaning of some passages. When I was really stressed, I would take my bible to him and lay my head in his lap and he would read to me until I was calm again.

George Eliot said, it best: “What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined for life? To strengthen each other in all labor, to rest on each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent , unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting.” Tom died 11 years ago on January 1, 2000. It was a day filled with sacred moments, which I have written about elsewhere in this blog. I am very thankful I was blessed by God with a good man and a great marriage.

"No, dear brothers and sisters, I am still not all I should be, but I am focusing all my energies on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I strain to reach the end of the race and receive the prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us up to heaven" Phillipians 3:13,14 (NLT).

2010-12-16T20:29:00.002-06:00

With the Christmas holidays and the New Year upon us I am reminded of my Mother-in-Law’s words: “time moves whether we do or not,” which in turn reminds me of words my husband often said, “buy up the time while you still can.” At the end of every year I wonder where the year has gone and 2010 is no exception. With this year-end letter, I will try to summarize how I “bought up some of the time” God gave me.

In 2010, I

Conducted & helped conduct different workshops for Mission Teams and their stewarding churches; conducted Reentry Debriefings for returning missionaries; advised stewarding churches and their mission committees concerning missionary reentry; networked and found resources for stewarding churches and missionaries; conducted fact-finding clinical interviews; conducted mental health check-ups for furloughing missionaries; intervened for missionaries with their stewarding churches; assisted InterMission with their camp, Global Reunion, for third culture kids and their parents; I wrote about the camp experience for Resources, an MRN publication; travelled with Duane & Debbie Jenks to Qingdao and Beijing, China; served as a Counselor and Connection Group Leader in Brazil for Continent of Great Cities’ Continent Care Connections renewal for women; served as a Group Leader, Counselor for MRN’s Missionary Spiritual Renewal for furloughing, returning and returned missionaries; advised, encouraged, mentored and counseled missionaries and mission committees via Skype, email, telephone and Facebook; conducted one-on-one sessions with missionary candidates, furloughing, returned, and returning missionaries; worked with a number of adult missionary kids; offered hospitality to missionaries at different times throughout the year; mentored professional member care professionals and prospective missionary care professionals; and mentored missionaries in preparation for The Hills.

All my children are doing well. The poor economy has affected every one of them, of course, as it has affected so many of you. My eldest son took on an additional job that carried him through and just as my son-in-law’s hours were cut, my daughter, after months of unemployment was offered a job with the Dutch Bible Society. God provided. My oldest granddaughter graduates from ACU this spring with a degree in Social Work. My grandson graduates from Dallas Academy and is looking at colleges. My youngest grand-child learned to swim and to ice skate this last year. She is in second grade. My brother, though often in pain, has been granted his deepest wish for now – to remain independent and self-sufficient.

The holiday season makes me feel cheerful and thankful. I continue to be grateful to be a part of The Hills Church that exists to serve those not yet bought with the blood of Christ and I am thankful I am able to engage in meaningful work with Missions Resource Network. Both have a vision that only God can accomplish. Both surround me with godly colleagues who encourage me and love me. This is also a sad time of year for me. I will have been a widow for 11 years on January 1st. I miss my husband in so many ways, BUT I am grateful for the life God has given me (Eph. 2:10). I feel sooooooo blessed. I hope you feel equally blessed. What an awesome God we serve.

I wish you all a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2010-07-10T13:36:00.002-05:00

For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it Matthew 16:25

John Stott at age 88 has written his last book, Radical Disciple. I think the last words people choose to speak publically should be taken seriously. The book is only 137 pages long and I have underlined numerous quotes – there are so many quotable quotes – that I would like to share with you, but you will need to read the book for yourself. I include one quote in this blog. In his last chapter titled ‘Death,’ Dr. Stott speaks of cross-cultural missionaries (p. 123):

The death we are called to die as the conditions of fruitfulness may well be less dramatic than martyrdom. Nevertheless it is a real death, especially for cross cultural missionaries. It may be to them a death to comfort and ease, and a separation from home and relatives; or a death to personal ambition as they renounce the temptation to climb the professional ladder, being content to remain in a humble servant ministry instead; or a death to cultural imperialism, refusing to exalt their inherited culture (in spite of its being part of their identity) and identifying instead with the culture of their adoption. In these and in other ways we may be called to ‘die’ as the means of fruitfulness.

Not a startling quote to those who live this daily. I think about those of you, who did not choose to serve where you serve out of selfish ambition – to become Lord over some mission – but that you chose to live the life you live because Christ’s love compelled you to do so. And in this cross-life of dying to self, you have found true life, and it doesn’t seem to be sacrifice at all.

I salute you. I am most anxious to meet your converts – from every tribe, language and people. I send you my love and

Love’s Prayers,

Dottie

Things to ponder before becoming an expat < Blogs

2010-05-26T11:35:00.001-05:00

Things to ponder before becoming an expat < Blogs & photos | Expatica Spain

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2009-12-20T18:27:00.002-06:00

It's Christmas time and I have been reminiscing.

God is so good! I never would have thought ten years ago – Tom’s last Christmas – that my life would be so blessed. Before he died he made sure I had a new and warmer coat and a good car – the last tangible things he could do for me. I smile when I remember him. I smile at that memory often – flowers on my table at every special occasion – weekly coffee date nights, holding hands across the table – chocolates and romantic notes for no reason at all – and his never-complaining attitude about the pain he endured for years as cancer slowly ravaged his body. I miss our conversations centered on scripture. Tom loved word studies. He was a word-smith. His use of words was like artful, graceful dancing. I miss walking around the farm with him to inspect the crops. He would rub the seeds through his hand or inspect a bean pod or an ear of corn. He could tell if we were going to have a good crop or a poor one. I miss cutting wood with him for our wood burning stove. How special it was to sit in the den cozy and warm and read books together - sometimes reading to each other. I miss his cloud watching – he could tell from the clouds if it was going to rain or going to hail or if we should head for the cellar. I miss him at income tax time. He always took care of the things connected to money. It is a struggle for me every year to get any paperwork connected with money done. I miss his back rubs. There is so much to miss and now that I realize he will have been with the Lord ten years this coming New Year’s Day.(As an aside-cherish your relationships. Make them good ones! They are glue that holds us together in the bad times.) So, I’m feeling a bit sad even though I am joyful at the amazing life God has given me.

I get to work for Missions Resource Network. This last year has been nothing short of exciting. I have great colleagues. We work well together and we, also, have great fun together. I wish you could be a fly on the wall at our Christmas white elephant gift exchange!

I am privileged, most of all, to be a part of a mission minded church that works. This body of Christ exists for her neighborhood and the lost everywhere. Someone said to me when I first came here that a bad day at Richland Hills is best day some will ever experience. I get to be a part of all the great days there. I love this church.

I have many blessings that can only be attributed to God’s goodness. My cup overflows! Some of you I haven’t seen for a long time – but I know if we met today, we would pick up our conversation where we left off last time and that when we parted, we still wouldn’t have gotten all our talking done. Christ is our center and He has given us all meaning in our lives. I’m just as anxious to read your personal notes to me about God’s goodness in your lives as I am in sending out my notes. I pray your Christmas holidays are joyful and filled with happy family events. I also pray that we as a people are as willing as Mary and Joseph to bear the stigma, the uncertainty and dangers that saying “yes” to the call of God brings as they were.

May we rise to the challenges God places in front of us as we worship, serve our communities and bless each other in 2010. May our lives bring Our God glory and honor.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

2009-09-27T11:20:00.004-05:00

You were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body (I Cor. 6:20)

Therefore, I urge you from the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship (Romans 12:1)

WHO AM I?

I am from "Let us make human kind in our image"

I am from many places and cultures; Formed and shaped by language and experience

How are you?

Hoe gaat het met jouw?

Wie geht es Ihnen?

Comment se va?

Como esta?

I am from Dallas skyscrapers and cultivated fields of Nebraska - influenced by the desert of Arizona, Mokummer's city, Kansas wheat fields and the city of Sundance Square.

I am from a city set on a hill

I am from the stacks in Love Library, from main campus, east campus and Omaha campus

From ACC, York, ACU, UN-L, UN-O, Hastings, Concordia, UN-K, Friends

I am from counseling, psychology, family studies and therapy, social work, law, adult education and biblical studies

I am from East 10th Street, Edgemont Avenue, Nolenstraat, Pieter Calandlaan, Graan voor Visch, Thompson Avenue, Sao Paulo Court and 30 other addresses

I am from Love Field, East Hill, Eastside, Dana Street, Camelback, Hobemekade, Ookmeerweg, Central, Richland Hills and hundreds of other churches

I am from an upstairs apartment in an older home, an oil boom house surrounded by rattlers, copperheads, water-moccasins, scorpions, centipedes and tarantulas, and from a house with salmon colored walls with a swamp cooler

I am from unfinished houses, apartments, row houses, an arts and crafts home, and concrete slab tract homes.

I am from behold I prepare a place for you

I am from cook books, mystery books, DIY books, theology books, therapy books and the book of life

From Mother Earth, Prevention, Woman's Day, Family Circle, Christianity Today, professional journals, blogs, Facebook, newsletters and reports

I am from cooking from scratch - chopping and dicing, slicing and peeling, kneading and mixing, rolling out dough: bread dough, pie crusts, cinnamon rolls, sugar cookies, biscuits and noodle dough

I am from the bread of life

I am from pantries filled with home-canned vegetables, pickles and jams from my garden, full freezer of cherries and strawberries and peaches and butchered beef, ham and bacon

I am from classrooms, green boards and chalk, counseling chambers and prayer closets

I am from Mary Belle and DeWitt and from Henrietta and Duncan

I am from Pauline and Thomas and Thomas Dee

I am from Tommy and Stephen, Rebecca, Paul and Rachel and sons-in-love, Russell and Michel

I am from Jordan and Parker and Trinity and unnamed lost grandchildren

I am from Kathryn and Heinrich and Fredrik

I am from kneeling in prayer

I am from tears, despair, lost, lonely and fit to be tied

I am from behold I am with you, even to the end of the age

I am from love

I am from bought at a price

I am from Father, Son and Holy Spirit

I am from unsurpassing joy

I am from peace that is beyond understanding

I am from grace

I am from BLESSED!

Who are you?

With thanks to Mary Pipher and her book, Writing to Change the World for this idea.

Dottie

2009-06-09T18:38:00.002-05:00

"Do your best to come to me quickly...When you come, do your best to bring the cloak I left with Carpus of Troas and bring the scrolls, especially the parchments...Do your best to get here before winter...The Lord be with your spirit" (2 Timothy 4:9-22).

I arrived at the DFW Airport shortly after 5 p.m. on Sunday, the 7th from Brisbane. I am jet-lagging, but feeling very well after two Come before Winter Renewals, first in Australia and then in Papua New Guinea.
We arrived in Australia to some rainy days – much coveted by Australians after a severe drought. Water restrictions were still in effect. As in Texas, severe drought was followed by floods. We arrived shortly after the flood to periodic rain. There was a swine flu alert and we all walked through thermal portals, checking our body temperature, before entering customs. Customs in Australia are as strict as U.S. customs. From the airport we went by bus to our Australian hotel, which was just a couple of blocks from the beach. We spent our first day sight-seeing on one of those rainy days. We took a bus to a Wildlife Preserve, walked all around it, had our pictures taken with a Kuala bear, petted kangaroos- one had a baby in its pouch- saw wildlife only found on this continent and bought some souvenirs.
We welcomed 40 women from Australia, New Zealand and Fiji to our Australian renewal. I was in charge of registration procedures at both renewals so I got to put faces with names quickly. I got to know a number of the women, some very well, in just a week’s time. I had four women in my prayer cluster and had five prayer appointments and a few counseling appointments happened in my “spare” time. My days began at 6 a.m. and ended each night between 11 p.m. and midnight. The food was great with great variety – as the hotel served both western and eastern guests. I had my fill of miso soup every morning for breakfast, one of my favorites. Georgia Freitas was my room-mate in Australia and I learned to love that woman even more.
Saturday after the Australian renewal, we flew from Brisbane to Fort Morseby and then on to Madang in Papua New Guinea. We stayed at Jais Aben about 7 kilometers from Madang. For Papua New Guinea our facilities were quite modern. It was a piece of manicured jungle. Many, many different kinds of beautiful flowers, coconut trees, banana trees, and a fruit tree that I couldn’t figure out what it might be. The orchids were magnificent. We had electricity, supplemented by a generator when the electricity failed, solar heated hot water (warm every afternoon and evening, but not mornings), and air- conditioning and fans in our rooms (two rooms per cabin) and the water was drinkable – from an artesian well on the property. The 41 women who came to the renewal felt as if they were being treated to real luxury. Jais Aben had a trained hospitality staff and a chef and the food was good – tropical fresh fruit and vine ripened tomatoes were present at every meal. My room-mate was Bernadine Willis from New Zealand, the ambassador from the previous renewal, whom I grew to love. Again, I had four women in my prayer cluster and six prayer appointments, so I got to know 10 women fairly well. The Come Before Winter team made a habit of sitting with someone new at every meal, thus letting us get the know the women as well as possible in a week’s time.
On Friday afternoon after the renewal was over, a van took us into Madang to the Pioneer Bible Translation offices. From there we walked to the open market - there we were able to buy a few souvenirs. That evening it rained, as it often did while we were in PNG, but we were still able to go to a very nice restaurant, where I enjoyed two of my favorite Indonesian dishes – satay (pork on a wooden skewer) with nasi (fried rice with special spices and veggies) before the van picked us up to return us to Jais Aben. We left for Australia early the next morning. Our Air Niu Guini (pronounced New Guinea) plane for Fort Moresby arrived two hours late due to needed repair. We barely made our transfer flight into Australia. When we arrived in Brisbane, we had no baggage. At first I thought it was because the luggage didn’t make it to the plane, but later learned our luggage was loaded and then unloaded. Someone calculated the weight of the plane and measured the fuel available and decided that it was necessary to remove the luggage or us and they decided on the luggage, for which I am now grateful as we would never have made it to our flight to the U.S. if they had chosen us. Thanks to much help from the Air Niu Guini staff in PNG and the Qantas staff in Australia, our luggage went straight from the morning plane from PNG to our Qantas plane to U.S, skipping Australian customs. We spent our last night in Australia in downtown Brisbane, munching on pizza in our rooms as we debriefed and later washed and dried our clothes for our next day’s travel to the U.S. If there had been no washer and dryer available to us, I’m not sure our fellow passengers would have appreciated our presence on the plane.
I will try to write more when I send out my monthly report. I just want to take the time to thank all of you for your many, many prayers for me and us and for the women who attended these renewals. Come before Winter brings women spiritual and emotional nurture – a time of in-depth Bible study and prayer and fellowship - it is missionary care at its best and it was a privilege to be asked to be a part of it.
Love’s Prayers,
Dottie

2009-04-28T14:55:00.003-05:00

I read the news every day. It comes to me in two daily emails from the Overseas Security Advisory Council: Global Security News. I read about volcanic eruptions, monsoons, earthquakes, floods, droughts, fires, mud slides, Mafia crime waves, coups, strikes, terrorism, civil war, corruption, etc. Why? So I can keep the stewarding churches of our missionaries and our missionaries informed of possible danger to them or determine if there is some way I can help some missionary somewhere because of the situation they find themselves in. I get emails from missionaries needing help, from churches asking for resources or help. I am now receiving emails for help through Facebook. With the economic times, I’m getting emails from former students, returned missionaries, former ministers, asking if I know a resource to help them. Some are losing their homes…some are on the edge of homelessness – they need rent for next month. By the time the Jim Lehrer Report is over in the evening, I’m sometimes just about done in – no more! A fellow Missionary Care Director I am mentoring, who shared with me some tough decisions he and his agency’s personnel manager are going to have to make, commented to me this last week: “Our work is inundated with problems – there are just so many problems in the world!” I had to agree. When I worked at York College and was the head of the Counseling Center, I used to walk home through a park and see the blades of grass. One day I thought, “There are as many problems in the world as there are blades of grass.” Now I always think that thought when I look down at the grass. So we rejoice when good happens – a pilot safely lands a damaged air-craft on the Hudson River – a captain is rescued from pirates - Is it any wonder that Susan Boyle (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RxPZh4AnWyk) has taken the world by storm? Every time I have listened to her sing, tears stream down my face. I think The National Catholic Weekly explains why:

The way we see Susan Boyle is very nearly the way God sees us: worthwhile,
special, talented, unique, beautiful. The world generally looks askance at
people like Susan Boyle, if it sees them at all. Without classic good
looks, without work, without a spouse, living in a small town, people like
Susan Boyle may not seem particularly "important." But God sees
the real person, and understands the value of each individual's gifts: rich or
poor, young or old, single or married, matron or movie star, lucky or unlucky in
life. God knows us. And loves us. "Everybody is somebody"
said Archbishop Timothy M. Dolan at his installation Mass in New York City
yesterday. That's another reason why the judges smile and the audience
explodes in applause.

I think for the same reason, every now and then, I go to our RHCC web-site and look at the Cardboard Testimonies again (http://www.rhchurch.org/pages/cardboard-testimonies/) Human beings are Eikons of God. God wants no images made of Himself because He has already made one – us! There is something intrinsically valuable about every human being. Every human being can become a testimony to God’s great love for us. And for that reason, we never give up.

2009-01-26T16:24:00.002-06:00

“And you, my son Solomon, know the God of your father, and serve him with single mind and willing heart; for the Lord searches every mind, and understands every plan and thought. If you seek him, he will be found by you; but if you forsake him, he will abandon you forever” I Chronicles 28: 9.

When searching through a concordance, there are more verses that speak of the imagination as evil than speak of it as good. But imagination can be good. As a child I loved to read. Books carried me far away and my mind imagined all the scenes in the books I read. Perhaps learning about all those lands and the people who inhabited them was part of the impetus to my becoming a missionary.

When, around the age of 17, I was introduced to scripture, I read it with imagination intact. I imagined creation as I read about it. I imagined what it would be like for an angel to stand before me and say, “Fear not.” I always doubted those words from an angel’s lips to me would help me fear less, because it seemed to be a pretty awesome experience to me. No story escaped my imagination as I don’t think I can read without seeing pictures in my mind.
After reading Foster’s Celebration of Discipline, I began to add other details to what I read, such as imagining the smells, what things may have tasted like (manna) or felt like as I meditated on scripture.

Corporate worship is most always very meaningful to me. I think it is because I have such a repertoire of biblical stories in my memory and I can envision these stories in my mind in so many different ways. When I hear the word read, when I sing or when I take communion I see what I hear, read, sing, or meditate upon. Often when I pray I can see the four creatures flying up and down above the Father crying Holy, Holy, Holy. How great our God becomes as we try to picture what is impossible to picture. Some of my happiest moments in my life have been moments in active worship.

Scripture is correct to warn us about evil imaginations of our hearts, but imagination can be a good thing if it comes from a single heart that honors God, however, Paul stated in 2 Corinthians 2:9, "no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the human heart conceived, what God has prepared for those who love him." Imagination fails us when it comes to experiencing the reality. I look forward to that reality. Until then, I will imagine it.

2009-01-22T11:13:00.002-06:00

But if one of those who don't believe invites you to a meal, and you are inclined to go, eat whatever is set before you, asking no questions for the sake of conscience (I Corinthians 10:27)

I had lunch with a friend this week. Her husband is off on a short-term mission trip in a country where cleanliness is not a priority and eating some foods might make him extremely ill. To alleviate this possibility, he took along some peanut butter and some crackers. When he called home and had only a few minutes to talk before heading into a jungle area without cell phone towers, she only had time to tell him not to eat the peanut butter – it might be contaminated with salmonella (the news is the U.S. about a recall of contaminated peanut butter). Makes one wonder, does it not?

Years ago, after reading Ted Ward’s book, Living Overseas: A Book of Preparations, I have made it my habit to eat, when in doubt, Chinese, or any food that is prepared using very high heat and drinking boiled tea, while avoiding raw, unpeeled foods. I’ve tried to be carefully adventurous. There are some foods I don’t want to try again if I can help it and sickness has been fairly limited thus far…though I carry little bottles of remedies with me everywhere I go. But then again, I had to check out the peanut butter I bought last week. I guess none of us will get out of this world alive.

I found this on Godtube. Hope you enjoy it:
http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=3a62ba7446ede9dbc1bd

Love's Prayers,
Dottie

2009-01-20T12:07:00.002-06:00

"A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture are assimilated into a TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background" Pollock, David & Van Reken, Ruth, Third Culture Kids, The Experience of Growing Up Among Worlds. Boston/London: Nicolas Brealey Publishing, p. 19.

Below is a letter from one of these TCKs to a family considering coming back to U.S. for the sake of the children. This TCK gave me permission to place this on my blog and also gave me permission to allow her name and phone number to appear, so that if you have questions about raising children elsewhere, she might be helpful to you.

Hey, I’m Kris Bowen, daughter of Mark and Debbie Hooper. I understand that you are having some inner-struggle on raising children in a foreign culture. I wanted to give you the perspective of one of those children! As you might know, my parents moved our family to India when I was 4 months old. We lived there for five years. I have NEVER regretted their decision. In fact, I have always felt incredibly blessed to have been able to experience a different culture, and often wish we could have been there longer, so that I could have experienced it when I was a little older as well. It is true that I was not able to be close to my grandparents, aunts and uncles, but the people there became my family and I never felt deprived in any way. Since I was so young, this was just how life was. I didn’t feel like I was weird or that something was missing from my life. When we moved back to the States, it was definitely something that set me apart, but never in a bad way. And aren’t Kingdom children supposed to be “set apart” anyway? I always felt cool, because I had lived in a foreign country when many of the children that I went to school with had never even left the state of Tennessee. I feel like I matured a lot faster than my peers as well, because I had experienced so much. Now that I am older (24 now), I am still so thankful for the experience. It has helped me in my chosen profession of social work and just in life in general, to be able to relate to people better, especially those that are here in the States that come from a different culture. And it sure didn’t hurt when I was looking for a job! I have experienced life in a totally different way than the “norm” and it has changed who I am (or I guess who I would have been), but I think I’m a better person for it. In fact, sometimes I forget that this is not how everyone’s life is! I am married now to a wonderful man, and we plan to move overseas to do our Father’s work. And I have no apprehensions of having/raising children in the same manner in which I was raised. I feel so “lucky” to have experienced what I have and I wouldn’t trade it for any amount of “normalcy”!

Kris Bowen, BSW
Infant Adoption Training Specialist

111 Racine Street
Memphis, TN 38111
(901) 634-8199 (office)
(901) 323-3640 (fax)

While there might be disadvantages in growing up in a cross-cultural environment, Clyde Austin, Ph.D. compiled a list of advantages which I have copied below. I would like to add, that I've never spoken to someone who, though s/he might be struggling with U.S. life, would ever trade their cross-cultural life experiences for a mono-cultural identity.

Advantages of Being a Missionary Child or TCK
Clyde N. Austin, Ph.D.

Social
* family becomes a major social supportive agent; develop closer ties to family; more individual attention and time spent together as a family (Harrell, p.3)
* “enriched and strengthened from roots in different soils”
* oriented to involvement in social and community service
* forced to “grow up”
* meet a lot of people
* see people working at the “gut level”
* learn not to stereotype
* able to handle adjustment problems
* “never a dull moment”
* slower pace
* less complex life

Spiritual
* achieve a “sense of mission”; develop a sense of pride in helping in the work
* Christ-centered home
* know all about mission work
* spiritual bond with parents
* spiritual & mental maturity
* fellowship of missionaries
* proud that parents were presenting the Gospel

Educational
* academic curriculum for college-bound student frequently excellent (Harrell, p.5)
* learning enrichment in host country
* cultural exchange
* second language
* understand and relate to diversity
* broader educational experiences
* boarding school a good prerequisite for college
* independence of thought
* better prepared for study in US
* enjoyed closeness of school on mission field
* become more open-minded
* firsthand study of a different culture
* often superior to US (Harrell, p.2)
* base setting a good place to encourage creativity and flexibility among students (Harrell, p.5)

Worldview
* widened horizons
* “On the general level, ‘expatriates’…gain a separate identity of their own, irrespective of their nationality”
* clearer perspective in world affairs
* enlarged world view
* another perspective on life & values; compare with home
* “Grew up as an international citizen instead of an ultra-patriotic nation-worshipper…”
* become aware of privileges in USA
* objectivity: Can step back and look at American life without many biases that US residents have
* “Getting to know the cultures as they are instead of how America portrays them”
* the opportunity to know other cultures personally compensates for leaving the US (Harrell, p.2)

Friends
* learn to accept new friends with different backgrounds
* varied contacts with many interesting people leads to broader scope of friendships
* being creative at play

Climate
* freedom of outdoor life
* beauty and climate of another culture
* a lot of outdoors time

Travel
* diverse traveling experiences
* variety of adventures

Other
* new and interesting animals
* being “special” because I lived elsewhere
* realize that being “different” is okay (Harrell, p.3)

This is the day the Lord has made
Let us rejoice and be glad in it! (Psalm 118:4)

2009-01-19T14:33:00.007-06:00

And I heard a voice from heaven, saying, "Write, 'Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on!'" "Yes," says the Spirit, "so that they may rest from their labors, for their deeds follow with them (Revelation 14:13).

This last weekend after worship, it was my turn to work at the Member HUB (place to sign up for workshops or get information about upcoming events). A couple stopped by the HUB and inquired, “You are Dottie Schulz, aren’t you?” “Yes,” I replied. They then proceeded to tell me how much my husband, Tom, had meant to their three children, who had attended York College and had studied under Tom. How special it is to still hear good things about my husband. Lately there have been several such occasions.

Just recently, a former York College student from Chicago was visiting friends in Frisco, Texas, heard from his friends that I now work at Missions Resource Network and drove all the way over to the office with his youngest child just to tell me face-to-face how much my husband had meant to him. Before he left the office, he said, “I’m headed for Zambia and it’s because of his influence.” Last month another former student, who spent years in Europe, asked to be my friend on Facebook. He wrote on my Wall that he went to the last York College Homecoming just to find me so he could tell me personally how much Tom meant to him and how great his influence had been in his life. The Winter 2008 issue of Heritage Magazine from York College featured an article about Brian Kohlsheen, former York College student and former YC baseball coach. Brian left York to become a Scout for the Atlanta Braves and is best known for recruiting Kerry Ligtenberg and Adam LaRoche for the Braves. In 2000, Brian became the Regional Manager of the Phillies. Brian came to York on a baseball scholarship. He was in Tom's Bible classes and had lots of questions, which he said Tom patiently answered. I don't remember who baptized Brian, but I know Tom baptized a lot of students.

Max Lucado told part of Tom's story of his last day on earth (anonymously in one paragraph) in his book, 3:16, and then honored Tom in the last sermon he preached at the Richland Hills Church,, and though Max got part of the story a bit wrong, you can imagine how special it was to have Tom honored in this way.

But the story doesn’t end there. Every time our family gets together, our children talk about their “Papa.” This last Christmas our youngest daughter and her husband, a graphic artist, gave everyone in the family a special gift, a one page, 24 by 18 inch calendar. The calendar paper is black and all the printing is in white. At the top of the calendar are the words, “It's just as we feared. It’s another day.” Those were words Tom spoke to me every morning of the world when he would come into our bedroom to awaken me and to give his sleepy-head wife a strong cup of hot, black coffee. Underneath those words are three small pictures of Tom, copied from black and white glossy pictures, taken by one of his students for an art project, that I recently rediscovered in a folder in his file cabinet. I scanned the pictures and emailed them as attachments to all the children. Below the pictures of Tom is a 12 month calendar and at the bottom of the calendar is written, “In loving memory of Papa.” Such a special gift to all of us and so appreciated by all of us!

What was it about Tom? For one, he loved God. He loved God's word and he was obedient to that word, no matter the cost. He truly cared for people. He listened a lot and spoke little. He would state his opinion, but never tried to force his will onto others. He went the extra mile. He was a man who knew how to work without complaint. After his left arm was eaten away by cancer, he still worked in the garden and together we cut wood and hauled it home in the pick-up. It was his attitude. If something unpleasant needed to be done, from confronting someone about their sin to helping someone butcher a hog, no one would have ever known he thought it was unpleasant. Shopping was not his favorite activity, but he would go shopping with his family and be cheerful about it. He didn’t always like to attend social functions, but he would go and no one would ever suspect that he didn’t want to be there. He could be dead tired and want desperately just to be alone, but if the door bell rang and someone needed to talk, no one was more welcoming. But the day after Tom learned that there was no more medical help for his condition, he turned to me and said, "Okay, I'm dying. I don't want want you to cook any more brocoli for me." I must have looked shocked. I said, "But you love it. I buy it and fix it just for you," to which he answered, "I have never enjoyed it." Since our return from Holland, I must have cooked brocoli for supper at least once a week. In all the years we were married, I can probably count on one hand any complaint he might have had about something I cooked. After each meal he would get up from the table and hug me from behind, give me a big kiss and thank me for the meal. It was his ritual - like his ritual of waking me with a cup of coffee. The hospice nurse remarked at his funeral that he must have loved me very much because he never complained to me about the amount of pain he was experiencing (though we all knew). Did Tom ever object to anything, you wonder. Yes, he would stand to the death on important matters, so that when he did stand, people stopped and listened. Tom knew he was saved by grace and he believed saved people needed to be grace-filled, gracious people. He certainly showed grace to me. Tom has been with the Lord since January 1, 2000. 'Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on!'" "Yes," says the Spirit, "so that they may rest from their labors, for their deeds follow with them (Rev. 14:13).

I pray Tom's example encourages you.

2008-12-10T10:26:00.002-06:00

And Mary said:
"My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant.From now on all generations will call me blessed, for the Mighty One has done great things for me-holy is his name. His mercy extends to those who fear him,from generation to generation. He has performed mighty deeds with his arm; he has scattered those who are proud in their inmost thoughts. He has brought down rulers from their thrones but has lifted up the humble. He has filled the hungry with good things but has sent the rich away empty. He has helped his servant Israel, remembering to be merciful to Abraham and his descendants forever, even as he said to our fathers" (Luke 1:46-55).

What strikes me as significant about Mary is first her immediate obedience; Second, is her praise of God. What strikes you?

2008-06-27T11:40:00.006-05:00

καθως γεγραπται οτι ουκ εστιν δικαιος ουδε εις
“There is none righteous, no not one” Roman 3:11

Some things I learned or rather, relearned this month:

That injustice looks different to the victim when the victim becomes the perpetrator.
That what is despised in others is often hidden within one's self.
That moral weakness given power can become tyrannical.
That a religious person is not necessarily a holy person.
That survival often involves becoming a political animal.
That winning isn't everything.
That standing alone is lonely.
That God reaches out to the alone and lonely.
That compassion for another is not dependent on that person's goodness.
That sometimes the praise of others isolates more than it connects.
That filling other peoples' cups fills your own.
That only God can solve ethical dilemmas.
That God loves us and wants to be our Father.
That in spite of ourselves, our God is gracious.
That there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.
That “There in no one good, except God alone” (Luke 18:19)

2008-06-09T16:12:00.004-05:00

Lord, who may dwell in your sanctuary?
who may live on your holy hill?
He whose walk is blameless and
who does what is righteous,
who speaks the truth from his heart
and who has no slander on his tongue,
who despises the vile man
but honors those who fear the Lord,
who keeps his oath even when it hurts,
who lends his money without usury
and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.
He who does these things will never be shaken (Psalm 15).

It's been a long time since my last post and some have written to chide me a bit about that. I read a few blogs - one of which is written by John Mark Hicks - another by Bobby Valentine and now and again, I catch up with what Jim McGuiggan has to say. Once in a while when I have time, I read an article from N.T. Wright's web-page or from Stanley Hauerwas' web-page. Once a month, I like to read some of what Ben Witherington has to say. Most every week I am blessed to hear the well thought out lessons Rick Atchley so ably delivers. With all that I read and hear that is so excellent; I don't feel I have much to add to the words of the world, so have been reluctant to write lately.

I'm reading some really good books right now. A book that I am enjoying and learning from right now is a book by Hicks, Melton & Valentine called A Gathered People. Another book I've almost finished is Evil and the Justice of God by N.T. Wright and a book of a little different genre that I am finding instructive is Rubel Shelley's book, Divorce & Remarriage: A Redemptive Theology. Today I’m just going to quote from one book – A Gathered People and talk about some of what I’ve been learning from the lessons on Amos that Rick has been preaching.

Hicks, Melton & Valentine place a lot of emphasis in the early part of their latest book on the connection between righteous living and holy worship. Rick’s lessons on Amos also emphasize how much God hates our worship when we lack mercy and compassion and do not reflect God’s love to our neighbor in our behavior. (Surely Jesus cleared up who our neighbor is in his parable of the Good Samaritan.)

On pages 24-26 Hicks, et.al state: "The Old Testament teaches that God desires the sacrifice of a contrite heart (Psalm 51:16-17), that obedience is better than cultic ritual (I Sam 15:22), and that a true fast includes helping the poor (Isa 58:6-7). According to Jeremiah, lifestyle gives validity to religious rituals (Jer 7:1-15) Amos denounces those who keep a form of religion but have a life antithetical to it (5:18-24):

I hate, I despise your religious feasts;
I cannot stand your assemblies.
Even though you bring me burnt offerings
and grain offerings,
I will not accept them.
Though you bring me choice fellowship offerings,
I will have no regard for them.
Away with the noise of your songs
I will not listen to the music of your harps.
But let justice roll on like a river,
righteousness like a never ending stream.

On page 26 of their book, from chapters 12-16 of Deuteronomy, these authors have culled seven ways worshippers are to love God which I’ve paraphrased
Show liberality & kindness toward the poor;
Respect the property of others and the dignity of all human beings;
Actively protect your neighbor against accidents and help them when they suffer loss;
Practice justice in court and in all business transactions
Recognize that there is a sphere of justice that belongs to God alone;
Respect the environment and be good stewards of God's creation;
Foster the well-being of family.

Rick Atchley has been preaching a series of sermons he has titled The Lifestyles of the Rich and Amos. So far he has titled his sermons: 1) The Roar of the Lord; 2) Four is Enough; 3) Choice Words; 4) Justice or Just Us; and 5) Slave Trading. He will pick up the series again sometime in August.

Rick asked us to read the book of Amos, which I did. He made a statement recently after one of his lessons that he hoped what he had been preaching would be a blessing to us, but that he hoped we would not say we were enjoying his lessons. I don’t quite know what to say to that. I guess I can say I have been blessed. Right after I read Amos, I asked God what he wanted me to meditate about. This thought came to me: try to look at the world the way God sees it. Since I read emails from the Overseas Security Advisory Council every day, I read a lot about the corruption in the world - conflicts and wars and kidnappings and so forth. I realize that what I read about is just a minuscule part of the evil that takes place each day. Not all evil makes the news – the bitter words spoken in the car on the way to worship – the affair the spouse doesn’t know about yet – the TV show that promotes lust – the un-forgiveness experienced between people – the child that seldom receives a loving word – the slander –the gossip, the abused street child. Just how heavy was the burden Jesus carried to the cross? I can’t imagine. What amazed me is the picture I received of God that day – his love for the downtrodden, the disenfranchised, the orphan and widow, the slave, the foreigner, the lost. I suddenly understood, in a new way, how much God hates religion. I understood Jesus’ anger in the temple when he overturned the tables of the money-changers. I wanted to rush out and apologize to unbelievers how sorry I was that we have let religion get in the way of knowing Jesus.

I learned last year not to answer too quickly when someone asks me if I’m a Christian. When asked that question I now ask the question, “What do you mean by the word, Christian?” Sometimes after I hear the definition given to that word, I have to say, “If that’s what you mean by the word, Christian, then ‘no, I’m not.’ But I am a Christ Follower and…” I read somewhere this year, I think in the book, Un Christian, that perhaps the reason churches all over are declining in growth and in reputation, is because of the behavior of Christians themselves. I guess we have a bit of God within us though – we seem to hate the hypocrisy we see in others – we just don’t seem to be able to see it in ourselves very well -another reason we need time in the word, good preaching and good books - and perhaps, I should add, people who really love us enough to confront us when we need it. I prefer the gentle confrontation, but God loves us enough to put an Amos in our life when we need it.

God hates hypocrisy, but loves those who are sinned against. Someday, He will make it right. God loves those who act justly and who love mercy and who walk humbly with their God (Micah 6:8). That is all He requires. It is simple. The trouble is … this kind of life is costly.

Lord, who may dwell in your sanctuary?
who may live on your holy hill?
He whose walk is blameless and
who does what is righteous,
who speaks the truth from his heart
and who has no slander on his tongue,

who despises the vile man
but honors those who fear the Lord,
who keeps his oath even when it hurts,
who lends his money without usury
and does not accept a bribe against the innocent.
He who does these things will never be shaken (Psalm 15).

2008-02-01T14:56:00.000-06:00

Again I looked and saw all the oppression that was taking place under the sun. I saw the tears of the oppressed--and they have no comforter (Eccl. 4:1) Come to me, all you who are troubled and weighted down with care, and I will give you rest (Matt. 11:28). For I satisfy the weary ones and refresh everyone who languishes (Jeremiah 31:25).

Jim Reppart gave me permission to blog his most recent letter. Please read the installment following this one concerning the devaluation of the American dollar.

While in Arusha, Tanzania we visited the United Nations International Tribunal concerning the Rwandan Genocide. As I listened to the court deliberating over the possible role of the defendant in the genocide, I was holding the "Daily Nation" newspaper from Kenya which had more devastating headlines and photos of the continued violence that has taken on ethnic proportions. I thought to myself, how ironic. Here we are 14 years after the Rwanda genocide still sorting it out and will we be here another 14 years from now sorting out what is happening or might happen in my beloved Kenya?

I remember the horror I felt in 1994 when the first hand reports from Rwanda reached Nairobi. I remember the demonic look in the eyes of the killers captured in the graphic photos. Here I sat listening to attempts of justice while at the same time looking at another photo of demonic eyes. Only this time the photo was taken a few days ago close to the place my son James and I used to go fishing.

Some have asked how such a thing can happen in a nation that claims to be mostly Christian. While judgment must be made against such atrocities it also calls for personal reflection by all of us who call ourselves "Christian." What happened in Rwanda and now Kenya demonstrates the power of evil that lurks beneath the surface. When unleashed it is always appalling the shape and size this evil becomes. Jeremiah says that we should not underestimate the deception of our own heart. It is "What Lies Beneath" that really counts. Jesus proclaimed that it is what is in the heart that creates behavior.

While we applaud the effort of Kofi Annan and others to bring about mediation it still will not solve "What Lies Beneath." It takes divine, supernatural power to deal with "What Lies Beneath." We all know that Jesus dealt with "What Lies Beneath" by giving us His very Spirit to change our hearts and guide our behavior. In the same newspaper, I was reading of a Christian family who gave their farm for the displaced people of their area so they could have a place to live. And there were many churches which braved the violence to minister to the basic needs of victims. I don't think it is difficult to see who the real followers of Jesus are. Our Lord's answer and response to the resulting chaos of evil is to simply enter into the fray and serve. Even when His own disciples were trying to decide "who won the election" he simply knelt down and washed their feet.

As we wind up the first round of language school and head up into Kenya, into the fray, we ask that you pray that God will lead us with wisdom and discernment as to how we can best demonstrate His grace to a very hurt and confused people. When people really see God's grace demonstrated, evil runs the opposite direction.

Grace to all,
Jim and Laura Reppart

2008-01-28T21:06:00.000-06:00

It was good of you to share in my troubles. Moreover, as you Philippians know, in your early days of acquaintance with the gospel, when I set out from Macedonia, not one church shared with me in the matter of giving and receiving, but you only, for even when I was in Thessalonica, you sent me aid again and again when I was in need (Phillipians 4:14-16).

Our family was on the mission field when the dollar began to fall. Our home church's eldership in Mesa, Arizona, was aware of the situation since several were involved in international business. One special morning one of the elders called us in Amsterdam to inform us that the church had raised our salary by $200.00 a month. It had to be past midnight in Arizona for us to receive the call so early in the day. They were so pleased and excited that they could do this for us.

We were most grateful for the church's thoughtfulness. I remember after the phone call that my husband, Tom, and I embraced in the hallway of our apartment. It took a load of worry off of our shoulders. However, by the end of that month the dollar fell so much that even with the $200 extra in our pay check, we made less money than the month before. The $200 saved us from extreme suffering.

The American dollar is in that place again. Missionaries all over the world are affected by the continuing devaluation of the U. S. dollar. Please be aware that all missionaries are now living on much less than they were six months ago and each month their salary is less than the month before.

A few mission committee members from different congregations have contacted me about this situation and asked my advice. My advice is to find out what your missionary made in the local currency before the dollar began its steep decline. Each month when you place your missionary's salary into their bank account, find out how many dollars it will take to give your missionary the same amount of money they made before the fall. Yes, it will raise your budget, but I am confident that when you present your case to the congregation, many will open up their hearts and pocket books to help these missionaries out. Of all expatriates, missionaries make the least money already. They are dependent on the local economy. They have no commisary to turn to. They have already given up eating most American products. The majority of the women cook all their meals from "scratch." There are no 'hamburger helpers' or 'frozen entrees' to pull out of their freezer. A pair of jeans costs twice what jeans cost here. A very small compact car in Brazil costs over $75,000.00. In many countries the tax on automobiles is 100% of the cost of the car. Gasoline prices here are high. Try paying over $7.00 a gallon as many of our missionaries do.

Missionaries are already sacrificing in many ways. Please consider paying your missionaries a set amount in their local currency each month so that they can at least maintain themselves. When I wrote my dissertation 23 years ago, money - the lack of it - was the second greatest problem in missionary life. Please, let's not repeat this history.

Love's Prayers,

Dottie

2007-11-24T23:35:00.000-06:00

"After you have threshed all your grain and pressed all your grapes, celebrate the Festival of Shelters for seven days. Enjoy it with your children, your servants, the Levites, foreigners, orphans and widows who live in your towns. Honor the Lord your God by celebrating the festival for seven days at the one place of worship. Be joyful, because the Lord has blessed your harvest and your work" (Deuteronomy 16:13-15).

Festivals and feasts and special days are good things. They bring us joy and they are great memory makers.

Sinterklaas (the forerunner of our own Santa Claus), the good bishop from Spain, arrived in Holland by boat on November 17th this year. At night, from November 17th until the 5th of December, Sinterklaas, on his white horse, and his helpers, Zwarte Piet's (Black Peter's) fly above the housetops looking for good children. When they find them they leave little treats in their shoes. A treat might be a tiny chocolate shaped mouse or it might be a Dinky toy truck. The children also leave treats for Sinterklaas, his horse and for Zwarte Piet. Zwarte Piet has been known to get so rambunctious, that children often find a chair or table turned upside down when they get up the next morning. On December 5th Sinterklaas leaves big gifts for good children. Bad children get a sack of salt, a bundle of sticks or a piece of black coal. Sinterklaas parties are fun. Gifts for your family and friends are wrapped appropriately and personally and the wrapping or covering of your gift is to fit the personality of the person receiving the gift. For instance, since my son-in-law loves golf, his gift of golf balls would be placed inside a home-made golf bag made from cardboard, paper and glue and it would be accompanied by a poem which my son-in-law would read to everyone. Sometimes a small special gift is wrapped in a plastic bag, along with some spoof gifts wrapped in plastic bags and buried in a can of syrup and coffee grounds. The recipient would have to dig into the can of goop until the real gift was found and of course, the poem written just for this occasion would be read to all. The poems must be true to the person's personality, also. A real Dutch Sinterklaas night is real family fun at its best and the treats are delicious. My favorite treats - chocolate letters and Sinterklaas's staff - puff pastry filled with almond paste shaped into a staff and baked and pepernoten (pepper-nuts), a tiny spice cookie that Zwarte Piet leaves. Yummy!

I came to love the Sinterklaas Feest better than Christmas and Santa Claus. When I lived in Holland Sinterklaas was not so commercialized and much was just home-made fun and very family oriented. We were Americans, so we also celebrated American holidays. Thanksgiving was one of those. Carrots were substituted for pumpkin, but the pie was just as good. At the time we lived in Holland there was no cornmeal, but cream of wheat was a reasonable substitute for making "cornbread," which turned into "cornbread" dressing. Turkeys were too expensive and chicken, though more expensive than pork or beef, was a good substitute for turkey. A lot of our festivities were home-made fun and became tradition in our house. Those traditions have become the glue that has held our family together through good and bad times.

If you find yourself far from home this holiday season, but don't have all the ingredients of home to put your feast together, be creative and make them up. The made-up part will become the tradition and the glue that will hold your family together someday. And once you return to the states, you will find that the meat and fresh produce isn't quite as tasty as there or perhaps that carrot pie is better than pumkin. The important thing is that you have made some home-made fun that your children will remember and recall every holiday for the rest of their lives.

If you are not far away from home and know a missionary family, you still have time to send a stuffing mix, some cranberry sauce, a can of pumpkin (don't forget the pumpkin spice), some pecans for a pie, a brownie mix or cake mix and perhaps some small gifts for the children. Remember to pack the things carefully and stuff the sides with dryer sheets and zip-lock bags, some aluminum foil, plastic wrap, a Sports Illlustrated and a woman's magazine from the grocery store. Unwrapping packages from home says more than "we remember." It says, "we care." It says, "we love you."

Buying special treats for missionaries could be made into something special at your church or it could become a family tradition in your family. Allow your children to make up some special wrappings and poems or stories to be included in the package. There are lots of ways to make memories your children will remember for years to come.

Missionary care is an attitude. Tell me all the ways you celebrate special holidays, how you make substitutions or how you help others celebrate.

Love's Prayers,
Dottie

2007-07-05T12:55:00.000-05:00

Am I my brother's keeper(Gen. 4:9)?

I picked up a veteran African missionary at the airport this last week who had just spent three weeks in Kazakhstan. After many complimentary remarks about her stay there and that the nationals often thought she was Russian, she remarked, “Nobody smiles. We were smiling all the time – that was one thing that set us apart from the Russians.” Not smiling – it’s the European way. I remember, as a very young woman with three children, moving to Amsterdam and learning very quickly, you do not greet people or smile at someone you do not know. Eventually, after seeing someone in the butcher’s shop over a six month period, some would begin to nod their head in greeting. I took advantage of my foreign-ness and would often ask people for help. The Dutch are perhaps the most hospitable people in Europe and love to help the stranger. In the butcher’s shop I might say, “I don’t know how to cook this meat,” and my American accent and youth, would bring me helpful answers and a recognition the next time I saw the same people. I have often found that asking others for help opens doors. The fact is, it’s harder - not impossible - to connect in The Netherlands. I often wondered if a newspaper article I read one day and the lack of connection between neighbors in Holland had anything in common. The article stated that one in three Dutch citizens needed some kind of mental health help. Sixteen million people living on 14,000 square miles might have something to do with seeking privacy, but in protecting ourselves from the crowds, we lose out on some much needed intimacy.

When I moved to York, Nebraska, we bought a house built in 1923. Of course, it had a front porch and a porch swing. All the houses in my neighborhood had porches and many had porch swings, but very few people took advantage of them. It was a lovely place to sit in the morning for your first cup of coffee or in the evening to wind down. But this was not a way to meet your neighbors. When we moved to the neighborhood there were no fenced-in yards. Over the years that changed. One way to meet the neighbors was to share produce from our garden. Mowing grass or shoveling snow at the same time as your neighbors brought more conversations. Holidays brought neighbors together as they exchanged cookies or took part in harvest parties at Halloween. With some effort a person could get to know his neighbors at some level.

I bought a house last year in a bed-room city for Fort Worth. I love my house. It is a peaceful place to go after working all day. But I do not live in a neighborhood – at least not yet. I have friendly neighbors on both sides of my house. The neighbors across the street are friendly, also, so I may be more blessed than most. There are only two or three women who do not work full time in my cul-de-sac. We all drive to work, come home, press our garage door openers, drive into our garages, close our garage doors and enter our homes. If we walk into our back yards, the fences are high enough that each of us has complete privacy. There is little opportunity to connect. Dr. Robert Putman, author of Bowling Alone: The Rise and Collapse and Revival of the American Community (copyright 2000), warns that our lack of connection with each other has plummeted and it impoverishes us. On the cover of his book he has several factoids:

• Joining and participating in one group cuts in half your odds of dying next year.
• Every ten minutes of commuting reduces all forms of social capital by 10%

If being connected helps keep us alive, then connecting is pretty important!

Larry Crabb stated at the October 2004 School of Spiritual Direction in Colorado Springs that lack of connection was at the bottom of nearly all psychological and emotional problems. He reiterated those thoughts in his book, Connecting: Healing Ourselves and Our Relationships. If you have not read this book, then it would be a good thing to do. Another good book to read is The Safest Place on Earth. In this book Crabb describes how disconnected Americans are with each other. We rush through life – our conversations are shallow and our visits casual. His solution is a spiritual community who become real with each other, who listen to each other, who encourage and nurture each other, and who accept each other warts and all. In such a place, Crabb believes God can heal disconnected people and allow them to reconnect with each other and ultimately, with Him.

In 2003 a thought-provoking report, “Hardwired to Connect: The New Scientific Case for Authoritative Communities,” prepared by the Commission on Children at Risk, a group comprised of 33 prominent children’s doctors, research scientists, and mental health and youth service professionals, was released. This report found that there was a great deal of evidence that children who are connected to “authoritative” communities have fewer childhood problems. Children who lack these connections face more psychological and emotional difficulties. Lack of community means our children are floundering.

We need to reconnect with one another. That is the theme of Bowling Alone by Putnam; it is the theme of Connecting by Larry Crabb, and it is the theme of Hardwired to Connect, the Report from the Commission of Children at Risk. It is the crying need of our society today. The best place to connect should be the community of Jesus Christ.

Recently, Rick Atchley, preached his 18th State of the Pulpit sermon (http://www.rhchurch.org/index.cfm?pg=doc&id=99). Two phrases from this sermon caught my attention: 1) Expect to connect; 2) Do good in the neighborhood. To accomplish this the community of Christ needs to concentrate on just a few things, i.e. become simple. A recent article in the Christian Standard (http://www.christianstandard.com/articledisplay.asp?id=643) by Randy Gariss, states that discipleship or spiritual formation cannot occur outside close, personal relationships. Academics alone will not get the job done. Gariss’ use of Gal. 5:13-22 is thought-provoking. Read the article and listen to the sermon. They are worth your time. The key to connection and spiritual formation is all tied up in godly, reciprocal relationships and servanthood. “When the church can get her key leaders to simplify their lives, to stop standing at a “dozen intersections” in the church and instead to focus on and share life with one primary group of disciples, then something healthier begins to develop.” That something is first of all caring community; second of all – a serving community. “The disciple-making church expects everyone to serve, and provides a clear, well-lit path to a place on a team where somebody’s needs are going to get met. As Jesus clearly stated, it is in giving your life away that you get it back. But when you get it back, it looks like Jesus. A church of “underemployed” believers won’t produce many disciples” (Gariss, see reference above). It would not be a bad thing to look like Jesus.
Somehow, community, caring, serving, and spiritual formation are wrapped up together.

There is so much more to be said on this subject. It seems the key is to simplify our lives and begin again to be our brother’s keeper. It will take time. It will take effort. I'm wondering just how I might simplify my life in order to be more. Are we up to it?

2007-03-16T02:34:00.000-05:00

“How beautiful on the mountain are the feet of those
Who bring good news” Isaiah 52:7

My husband, Tom, had very dry skin. In the winter his hands and feet would crack and bleed because of the cold. I used to rub his feet in with Watkins’ utter salve to try and remedy that condition. For you city folk, that is a salve used on the utters of cows when their teats crack and bleed. It was important to try and help the cows heal because the baby calves needed their mother’s milk to survive.

Tom used to tease the life out of his granddaughter, Jordon. He would begin to build his case by getting her to agree first of all that he was a preacher. Then he would get her to agree that preachers brought good news. Third, he would get her to read the verse above in Isaiah that the feet of those who brought good news were beautiful. He would ask her if the Bible verse was true. She agreed it was. Then he would ask her to agree that his feet were beautiful, to which she would say, “Nooooo, Grandpa!” And he would begin to build his case with her all over again. Jordon was steadfast, though. She would never agree that her Grandpa’s feet were beautiful.

Feet can be hurt in many ways. They can be cut, bruised, and scraped. Blisters can form on toes and on heels, a person can stub their toe or break it, and bones can be broken and sometimes feet can cramp. They can become calloused. I’m sure you can think of even more ways feet can be damaged. This can happen to the beautiful feet of those on the mountain who bring good news, our missionaries.

If the church wants to keep the feet of those who bring good news in good working order, they need to learn a bit about the art of taking care of feet. This means the church needs to be involved in a deeper way with their missionaries, understand their needs and to the best of their ability see that those needs are met.

If there are needs the church is not sure how to meet, there are resources. The important thing is to take care of those feet. It’s really hard to keep walking when your feet are in bad shape.

Love’s Prayers,

Dottie

2007-01-10T16:37:00.000-06:00

At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life. This is a trustworthy saying. And I want to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable to everyone (Titus 3:3-8).

In a recent move I found some documents again that I had packed away: letters from Russia, written in German, a marriage certificate written in German that consisted of a piece of folded stationary, stating that my husband’s grandfather, Paul Schulz, had married Margaretha Schmidt. It was signed by a Reformed Church pastor. The place was in Russia, but I’m not sure where, as the name is the German name for the city.

My husband grew up in a mostly immigrant community in Nebraska. Only sometime after my husband and I married were his home church services conducted in English in this town. Later German services were relegated to Sunday evenings and after awhile ceased to exist. The immigrants were scrupulously honest. Debts had to be paid. Houses and yards were immaculate. Behavior was monitored. Work was obligatory. It was important to be a good citizen. Why? Because immigrants are suspect. They don’t speak English. And if they speak English, it is with an accent. The criminal element comes from the immigrant community, does it not? At least that is the perception.

There was always some element of sadness among the older immigrants. Most never saw their relatives in the “old country” again. A letter from a distant relative was a joyous and sad occasion. So good to hear about life back “home,” but life back home was not very good. There was imminent war or there was abject poverty or there was the realization that you would never see that person again. One letter I was able to decipher was about how hungry everyone was back in Russia. People were eating sugar beets to stay alive. Could Uncle Paul send some money? But not to get any letters was bad, also. Did s/he die? Were they sick? There was a lot of “not knowing” and a hard-to-define loss. Should they grieve or not grieve? Most became hardened to grief. To cry would be to be weak. So the older community of immigrants held in a sort of secret, unspoken grief. Without closure, the absent remain present.

To be an American was important, but would you be allowed to be an American – in full standing? If you tried and the majority culture rejected you, would your own take you back in or would you become one of those marginal people on the edge of both cultures and members of neither? If you were allowed to sink into the culture, would you have to give up your immigrant status? Most of the children of the immigrants made it. The older ones endured the hardships for the sake of their children. This is still happening today.

Is there a place in America for immigrants who don’t speak English very well and who think about home and know they may never see their relatives again? Who is their family? Many, who have no physical family present, seek out a psychological family. They seek out others who speak their language. They often choose to live in neighborhoods that become increasingly ethnic in nature. This has been true for every ethnic group that has come to America. In Lincoln, Nebraska, there are the Russian bottoms (it floods there), in Chicago there is little Italy, in Philadelphia there is Little Poland, and in many East and West Coast cities there is China town. Increasingly, the world is moving to America. Is there a welcoming place for them? Is there a place where they can speak of their losses and gains and be given understanding? Is there a place where they will not be marginal?

Ideally, that welcoming place is the Community of Jesus Christ. Ideally, all who are alienated have a place in God’s community: the orphan, the divorced, the prisoner, the poor, the broken, the alien, the disenfranchised, the unemployed, the widowed, the old, the young and you and me and the foreigner.

Go into all the world might mean, go to a neighborhood near you, meet the world and make friends. I’m thinking, that these new immigrants could use some mentors to help them with their adjustment. They might like to learn English. I have been a foreigner and afraid because I didn’t understand what was going on. Believe me; I appreciated every kindness that was extended to me.

Eugene Patterson’s translation of John 1:14 is: Jesus became a human being and went and lived in the neighborhood. If we are to be Jesus, there are a lot of neighborhoods that haven’t met him yet and they are just down the street from where we live right now.

2006-12-20T11:00:00.000-06:00

An enemy might be able to defeat one person, but two people can stand back-to-back to defend each other. And three people are even stronger. They are like a rope that has three parts wrapped together – it is very hard to break (Ecclesiastes 4:12)

Last night I was given one of the nicest Christmas presents I have ever received. It was from a missionary. It is a picture. Inside the frame is brown matting with cutouts for three pictures. On the left is a cut-out that takes up the left part of the frame. On the right are two smaller square cut-outs, one on top of the other. Around the inside edge of the frame is glued a thin,narrow, very well made rope. It’s quite attractive.

In the matted, left hand cut-out is a picture of a very thin, bare-foot, weathered African with bowed head. In his hand is some rope that falls and wraps around his feet. In the top right hand smaller, square cut-out are the words in bold print, “Blessed be the tie that binds” (John Stewart). In the bottom right hand smaller cut-out is the verse at the top of this blog, taken from Ecclesiastes 4:12.

The significance of the picture is found in the letter on the back of the picture. This is what is written in that letter:

Kuv ba ter zie.

“Death has no place of its own, but it visits us all.”

Meet your brother, Kuv ba ter zie. His name means, “Death has no place of its own, but it visits us all.” He is a Dagara who lives in Nakar, Burkino Faso. He made the bit of rope that is on your frame. He makes it by running the strands in his mouth to moisten them and then rubbing them between his legs that are about as big around as baseball bats. His inner thighs have calluses where he does this everyday. He is blind so he cannot help the family with their fields and other jobs he would normally be expected to work. So he makes rope and sells it. He doesn’t make much money at all. He sells a bolt of it normally for about 50 cents. The first memory I have of Kub ba ter zie is when he asked me for a ride to his house after one meeting. He got in the truck with me and we started going down the road and then I realized that he is blind. “How am I going to get directions to his house? I’ve never been there before,” I thought to myself. But, amazingly, he asked me if we had hit the big dip in the road yet and we were about to hit it, then after that, he asked me if we had rounded the corner. After we did he said, “Do you see the corn field? At the end of it there is a path to the right that goes to my house. Do you see that?” I said, “Yes,” He said, “That’s my house.” You may notice that he is not wearing any shoes. That is not because he can’t afford any. He uses the bottoms of his feet to feel his way around the village of Nakar. He gets around quite well on his own. I asked him once if he could say something to the folks that support me, what he would say. He said, “Tell them that I was blind, but now I see the light.” He is one of the most enthusiastic and cheerful Christians we have in the Nakar church. Anyway, I just thought you might want to hang this up somewhere to remind you of how big God’s kingdom is, to remind you that you are simply a strand in a strong cord that will hold us all together for eternity, because of how much God has loved us all.

Love,

Aaron D. Burk
2006

Perhaps, now you understand why this is one of the nicest gifts I have ever received. I share it with you so that you, too, will appreciate our common bond with Christians everywhere – all because “God so loved the world…”

Love’s prayers,

Dottie

2006-12-18T12:21:00.000-06:00

2006 has whizzed by, but I will have to confess that for me, 2006 was another wonderful year.

I feel my work is going well at Missions Resource Network. I have held eight workshops this year on different topics – all concerned with missionary care. This allowed me to meet with members of missions’ committees from over 70 different churches. One of the workshops was very special, however. It was held in Brussels, Belgium at the Pan European Lectures. Dr. Steve Allison from ACU and I conducted it together, but what was extra special was being able to be with my children, Rachel & Michel, who live in Holland. It was special to spend a little extra time with them and my granddaughter, Trinity.

I also attended several lectureships, workshops and conferences this year – all of which edified me spiritually and/or helped me maintain/improve my skill level. I taught a short course at Abilene Christian University. It was great to be in the class-room again. And what is even nicer, I got invited to come back and teach on another missionary care topic next summer. Of course, my favorite thing is my involvement with missionaries at every stage of the missionary life cycle. This gives me JOY!

I have finally moved all my stuff to Texas. Moving is some of the most exhausting work I have done in a long time. I couldn’t have done it alone. Good people here and good people in York went all out for me or I would still be moving. It was hard to sell my York house, but God gave me a lovely house only two miles from my home church, Richland Hills Church of Christ My house is very “homey” and welcoming.

It’s good to be near grandchildren in Texas, too. This is Jordan’s last year of high school. She is a beauty and plans to attend ACU and be a part of their new developing soccer team. I went with Parker to his school this year (Grandparent's Day). He is a freshman. I’ve only gotten to do that twice because I have always lived so far away, but it was neat to be with him and meet his teachers. Parker is one good looking boy and will soon be taller than me. Reba has her own business. If you need a meal, she has one for you. Russell still works as a General Account Manager for his company. Reba and Russell are normal parents – they are involved in everything their children do at their two different schools and doubly involved with the Skillman church community where they worship. I don’t know how they do it.

Steve has been down twice to see me already and will be back at Christmas time again. He is partners in a new business – putting cabinets in new homes – and is busy with the band he plays in. They practice at his house in Omaha. They are recording a CD sometime before Christmas. Steve has gotten to be a pretty good song-writer. He wrote a poem just for me at Thanksgiving.

Michel continues to work as a graphic artist and Rachel has decided to go free-lance with her marketing expertise. Trinity began school this month – she turned four on December 12th. School begins around 9 in the morning and lets out at 4 p.m., but there is that two-hour lunch break in between. That means a parent needs to be home. Rachel & Michel are such good parents – when they adopted Trinity, they both went part time so they could be there for her. Trinity’s favorite activity: She loves to put on her princess dress and play princess.

I feel very blessed by God this year. I keep waiting for something bad to happen, and I’m sure it will someday, but I have to say that the good has certainly out-weighed the bad this year. I am sending this to those I think a lot of. I wish you a very blessed Christmas and a joyous New Year.

Love’s Prayers – Dottie Schulz

P.S. I want to pass on something I heard this morning. I hope you appreciate it as much as I: http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=6631954&sc=emaf

2006-10-19T11:53:00.000-05:00

Children are a heritage of the Lord,,
children a reward from him (Psalms 127:3).

My husband and I raised four Third Culture Kids (TCKs); that is, we raised our children in a country other than their passport country. We lived almost 15 years in The Netherlands. We sent our children to Dutch schools. We always spoke Dutch outside our home and at home, unless we had Dutch guests, we spoke English. Even though we parents spoke English, our children answered us in Dutch. They spoke English only when we had English speaking company who could not speak Dutch. At those times our children would acquiesce and speak English. They actually spoke English quite well. One of our children could speak with an American as well as with a British accent – whatever the occasion called for.

So many people worried about our children because they were not getting an American education. Our friends worried that our children wouldn't be able to read English. I ordered a number of American children's books out of a catalogue. When the kids were around, I would open up a book, read silently for about 5 minutes, laugh or smile about something I read, lay the book on a chair and leave the room or I would begin reading a story out loud and would have to suddenly do something else and leave the book at its most exciting point. Curiosity won out! All my children learned to read English on their own quite well. We also heard many stories about how our children would grow up not knowing how to spell. Well, for years, their spelling was atrocious. They spelled English words according to Dutch grammar rules. But one day, spelling words in English clicked in and all the dooms-day stories didn’t pan out. I've since decided that learning how to spell is a gift.

Upon our return to the states we discovered that our children were academically about two or three years ahead of their peers. My children can read and speak in three and four languages (English, Dutch, German and French). When our oldest daughter left us to return to the states for her senior year of high school, the school only offered one foreign language course. I called her on the phone and asked her why she had not enrolled in that class. It turned out that she was not allowed to take the class as my daughter spoke and read better German than the teacher. In her fourth year of high school, she had read 14 novels in German and the same number of books in Dutch, English and French. (By the way, high school begins about the time American kids enter 7th grade. Our daughter attended a five year high school. High schools in Holland are 4 year, 5 year and 6 years in length. Children who attend the 6 year high schools have an opportunity, if they make the cut, to attend university.)

There are a lot of advantages of growing up overseas. Ruth Hill Useem, Ph.D. and Ann Baker Cottrell, Ph.D. found that “Only 21 percent of the American population (24 percent of men and 18 percent of women) have graduated from a four-year college. In sharp contrast, 81 percent of the adult TCKs have earned at least a bachelor's degree (87 percent of the men, 76 percent of the women). Half of this number has gone on to earn master's degrees and doctorates.

Some other positive things about being reared in a country other than your passport are:

 Adult TCKs (ATCKs) continue their international involvement.
 ATCKs are adaptable and relate easily to a diversity of people.
 ATCKs are helpers and problem solvers.
 ATCKs feel different but not isolated.
 ATCKs often exhibit creativity and risk-taking behavior.
 Over 75% actively participate in their local community.
 92% have at least yearly contact with people from other countries.

These statistics fit my kids, as well. Living overseas may have its disadvantages. Most TCKs believe there are more advantages than disadvantages. I concur!

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-10-19T10:04:00.000-05:00

Two are better than one,
because they have a good return for their work:
If one falls down,
his friend can help him up.
But pity the man who falls
and has no one to help him up!
Also if two lie down together, they will keep warm.
but how can one be warm alone?
Though one may be overpowered,
two can defend themselves.
A cord of three strands is not quickly broken (Eccl. 4:9).

This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it! Today is a special day to remember because it is the anniversary of the day I married Thomas N. Schulz in Middlebrook Parlor at York College. I met my husband, Tom, at Monday night meetings at Abilene Christian College in April. I still remember his sermon: “going to the mission field two by two.” We married six months later at York College on October 19th. I never saw Tom in a tie until I walked down the aisle that night. Until that night I never saw him wear anything other than jeans, white T shirt and loafers. He looked pretty good in that T shirt, too. We never went to a movie until after we married. We did play miniature golf sometimes on Wednesday nights after church. He always won, except when he would let me win!

After Tom completed his master’s degree at ACC and we had spent a year with our sending-church in Phoenix, we went to the Netherlands and worked with a Dutch church for almost 15 years. Tom learned to wear a tie. When we went to Holland even “ditch diggers” wore ties with their work clothes!

We went to Holland with three small children and three years later adopted our Rachel. Except for the youngest, when we returned to the states our children were nearly all adults. They are the parents of my wonderful grandchildren. When we left the Netherlands, we went back to York College, where Tom occasionally wore a tie. He discovered clip-on ties and they often wound up clipped to his pocket.

What I remember today is a husband who can never be replaced in any way! The first thing I noticed about Tom the evening we met was his bible. It was worn…there were verses underlined…he had spent a lot of time reading and digesting the Word and he had only been a Christian three years. He wore out a lot of bibles in his life-time. How he loved the Word! When I got anxious or stressed, I would put my head in his lap and he would pick up his bible and would read out loud one chapter after another until I relaxed. Sometimes he or I would notice something we hadn’t noticed before and study for hours…looking up words in a lexicon or looking up things in a bible dictionary. I miss those times a lot.

The word to describe Tom would be the word, grace. He wrote his master’s thesis on that word. The root word for charis (grace) in classical Greek is beauty. Over time, the word began to describe the attributes of the King, later it described the King’s gifts, and still later, charis described the attitude of the one who received the gift – one of thankfulness. Tommy was a gracious man. He was a grateful person. He was also a romantic. He gave me flowers on every special occasion and he loved to hide them in places I wouldn’t go, so he could place them on the breakfast table before I got up. Surprise! He often sent me sweet notes. He made me feel like I was the most important person in his life. He was my best encourager. Tom took on all the attributes of grace in his personal life. I miss him, especially on days like today. I even miss his “grin and bear it” humor – the puns and the constant word plays.

Today is not a sad day. It is a day to thank God for the blessings of a good marriage and experiencing life with a godly man for 43 years. What does a person know when she is 18 years old? Not much! I knew I wanted to be a missionary, with or without a husband, but I prayed if God blessed me with a husband that he would help me get to heaven. God answered that prayer and more. He gave me a husband who often gave me a bit of heaven on earth.

George Eliot said it best:

-"What greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel they are joined for life? To strengthen each other in all labor, to rest in each other in all sorrow, to minister to each other in all pain, to be one with each other in silent, unspeakable memories at the moment of the last parting.

2006-10-02T13:54:00.000-05:00

“Do not say, ‘Why were the old days better than these?’
For it is not wise to ask such a question” (Eccl. 7:10).

At the Let’s Start Talking Banquet where we celebrated their 25th anniversary (it was a fabulous evening), nostalgia hit me! I knew Mark & Sherrylee way back then. I interviewed them as part of my doctoral work. Tom and I trained a Let’s Start Talking group and went with them to Groningen, The Netherlands, in the late ‘80s. If it were not for LST, there would be no church in Eindhoven in The Netherlands today. What a great work this has been. The best part of the evening – and it was all good – was seeing the Woodward children rise up and call their parents “blessed.” To all LST people: “may the next 25 years be as blessed as the first 25.”

Nostalgia! I saw lots of people I have known over the years at the banquet. It was there that I heard it again. I have a new name. It is “Miss” Dottie. When I first moved back to Texas, parents called me "Miss Dottie" to their children, but lately I’ve noticed many adults are calling me "Miss Dottie," too. I remember the first time students called me “Ma’am.” I was teaching a summer missions course for women at ACU in 1985. I interpreted ‘ma’am’ to mean ‘these students think I’m old.’ Does Miss Dottie have the same connotation?

The Dutch have their children call their close adult friends, ‘oom’ and ‘tante’ or uncle and aunt. All the children of all the expatriate evangelists and all the children of church members called me ‘Tante Dottie’. And I didn’t mind this at all until last year when one of them, with now graying hair, came up to me and gave me a hug and called me “Tante Dottie.” Wow!

Yesterday I attended a morning class at Richland Hills for the first time and two women came and sat next to me with their husbands. I was flanked on both sides by former York College students. They didn’t know each other so I was able to introduce them to each other and listen to them talk about their time at YC. Both had taken my husband for Bible and both thought he was a hard teacher, but both loved him. It was a neat experience for me, getting to eavesdrop as they talked about their college days. Then last night I went to my regular Bible class and it happened to me again - one of our visitors was a former YC student, who also had not only taken my husband’s Bible class, but had taken one of my classes, as well. Nostalgia, again!

Yesterday afternoon, I got out the YC annuals and looked up the students from the morning class and then last night, I found the photograph of our visitor. I also re-discovered that the 81-82 annual had been dedicated to Tom and me. Do you know how many years ago that was? That was a big year for me. I had graduated with my Master’s in December and in January of 82 I began a part-time private counseling practice in addition to teaching part-time. In the fall of 1982 our son, Paul, got killed.

While thumbing through old annuals, I also found a photograph of Diana Knight, who died in the Ukraine early last Friday morning. She was a beautiful young woman. It has made me sad thinking about Diana – so young – she had just turned 51 on Tuesday before she died on Friday during surgery. These kind of things are un-understandable! I not only found Diana’s picture, but also the pictures of her husband’s brother and his wife. They had been Master’s Apprentice students, serving many years in foreign countries. We never know what the day may bring. That’s why I always try to make it a point to say ‘good-bye’ and leave people hopefully feeling affirmed. Life is incredibly short. It would be lovely if you would send a note to Dennis and his children, even if you don’t know him or know him well. Unless you have lost someone dear, you might not understand how important just a short note is at times like these. Diana’s husband, Dennis, and their children, Jedidiah and Rachel, who attend Harding University, can be reached at:

Zaporozshkoye Hwy. 4/291
49107 Dnepropetovsk
Ukraine

So, this weekend was filled with memories. I rejoiced with LST as they celebrated 25 years of service, I met former students, who are now friends, and thought about life’s ups and downs, and thanked God for my blessings. Life is truly a paradox. Even though life may have a lot of downs in it, I can truly say that I feel wonderfully blessed. I have decided that “Miss Dottie” is really a lovely name and one that fits me perfectly. And ‘ma’am’ is just a southern way to show respect.

Remember to pray for our missionaries – especially Dennis. Don’t forget to continue to pray for Joyce Hardin, who lost her Dan just a couple of months ago and for Richard Chowning, who lost his Cindy about the same time. We know where Dan, Cindy and Diana are and that makes all the difference! The countries of Korea, Benin and Ukraine and the United States are better for having known these faithful servants!

“Blessed are the dead who die in the Lord from now on. “Yes,” says the Spirit, “they will rest from their labor, for their deeds will follow them” (Revelation 14; 13).

God bless you all!

Love’s prayers…Dottie

2006-09-27T09:49:00.000-05:00

This morning my former secretary, Laurie, at York College sent me this piece that I'm passing on to you to read. She asked me if I knew who wrote it. I don't. What I've Learned was given to me by another of my secretaries (Janet) in the past. When I taught at York College I gave a copy of this piece to my HRM and to my PSYCH majors the last day of the last class I would teach them just before graduation. There is so much books don't teach - perhaps can't teach. Maybe this is something you wouldn't understand until you've lived a while. What do you think?

If you know who wrote this, would you please let me know so that I can give proper credit. Enjoy!

What I’ve Learned –

I’ve learned –
that you cannot make someone love
you. All you can do is be someone
who can be loved. The rest is up to
them.

I’ve learned –
that no matter how much I care,
Some people just don’t care back.

I’ve learned –
that it takes years to build up trust,
and only seconds to destroy it.

I’ve learned –
that it’s not what you have in your
life but who you have in your life
that counts.

I’ve learned –
that you can get by on charm for
about 15 minutes. After that, you’d
better know something.

I’ve learned –
that you shouldn’t compare
yourself to the best others can do.

I’ve learned –
that you can do something in an
instant that will give you heartache
for life.

I’ve learned –
that it’s taking me a long time
to become the person I want to be.

I’ve learned –
that you should always leave loved
ones with loving words. It may
be the last time you see them.

I’ve learned –
that you can keep going
long after you think you can’t.

I’ve learned –
that we are responsible for what we
do, no matter how we feel.

I’ve learned –
that either you control your
attitude or it controls you.

I’ve learned –
that regardless of how hot and
steamy a relationship is at first,
the passion fades and there had
better be something else to take
its place.

I’ve learned –
that heroes are the people who do
what has to be done when it needs
to be done, regardless of the
consequences.

I’ve learned –
that money is a lousy way of keeping
score.

I’ve learned –
that my best friend and I can do
anything or nothing and have the
best time.

I’ve learned –
that sometimes the people you expect
to kick you when you’re down
will be the ones to help you get back up.

I’ve learned –
that sometimes when I’m angry I have
the right to be angry, but that doesn’t
give me the right to be cruel.

I’ve learned –
that true friendship continues to grow,
even over the longest distance.
Same goes for true love.

I’ve learned –
that just because someone doesn’t love
you the way you want them to doesn’t
mean they don’t love you with all
they have.

I’ve learned –
that maturity has more to do with
what types of experiences you’ve had
and what you’ve learned from them
and less to do with how many
birthdays you’ve celebrated.

I’ve learned –
that you should never tell a child
their dreams are unlikely or outlandish.
Few things are more humiliating, and
what a tragedy it would be if they
believed it.

I’ve learned –
that your family won’t always be there
for you. It may seem funny, but people
you aren’t related to can take care of
you and love you and teach you to trust
people again. Families aren’t biological.

I’ve learned –
that no matter how good a friend is,
they’re going to hurt you every once in a
while and you must forgive them for
that.

I’ve learned –
that it isn’t always enough to be
forgiven by others. Sometimes you have
to learn to forgive yourself.

I’ve learned –
that no matter how bad your heart is
broken the world doesn’t stop for your
grief.

I’ve learned –
that our background and circumstances
may have influenced who we are,
but we are responsible for who we
become.
I’ve learned –
that just because two people argue, it
doesn’t mean they don’t love each other
and just because they don’t argue,
it doesn’t mean they do.

I’ve learned –
that we don’t have to change friends
if we understand that friends change.

I’ve learned –
that you shouldn’t be so eager to find
out a secret. It could change your
life forever.

I’ve learned –
that two people can look at the exact
same thing and see something totally
different.

I’ve learned –
that no matter how you try to protect
your children, they will eventually get
hurt and you will hurt in the process.

I’ve learned –
that your life can be changed in a
matter of hours by people who don’t
even know you.

I’ve learned –
that even when you think you have no
more to give, when a friend cries out to
you, you will find the strength to help.

I’ve learned –
that credentials on the wall do not
make you a decent human being.

I’ve learned –
that the people you care most about in
life are taken from you too soon.

I’ve learned –
that it’s hard to determine where to
draw the line between being nice and not
hurting people’s feelings and standing up
for what you believe.

2006-08-29T12:13:00.000-05:00

"I tell you the truth,
Whatever you did for one
of the least of these brothers
of mine, you did it for me"
Matthew 25:40.

The following story by a missionary kid (MK) is printed with permission.

My Thoughts and Feelings About Cambodia
By John T. Sproul Jr.

I WAS STUNNED when my parents told me that we were moving to Cambodia. We were living in Lynden, Washington, a beautiful town in the Northwest. Just around seven months ago, my dad had graduated from S. I. B. I. This was were you could learn to become a preacher.
But okay, we didn’t move there for nearly a year. In Stockton, California, Central Church of Christ wanted to support us into going to Cambodia. I would’ve never even heard of the place if not for our neighbors across the street. They were Cambodian.
Cambodia? What kind of place was it? I knew nothing of it, except now it was the number one thing in my life—whether I liked it or not. Now, instead of talk-ing about, “Mom, what’s for dinner,” it was, “Johnny, in Cambodia…” you know, stuff like that. As soon as people found out about it, that’s all they wanted to talk about, and I knew that I couldn’t escape it.
I was mad, hurt, and jealous. Mad because this would be the seventh and eighth moves of my life—and I was 14 at the time. Since 1998, our family has moved every two years, which is very tough. Always saying hello and good-bye, there were a lot of emotions involved.
But we would not move until March, to Stockton that is. It was around sum-mer or so when I found out, so I had a few months to enjoy Lynden.
Then, my dad and mom started reading about the place, books, now I knew about the Khmer Rouge, about a horrid man named Pol Pot, stuff I never knew even existed. This was all new to me, and for awhile, I didn’t know what to do with it.
So, this is the year 2004, and I enjoyed the baseball playoffs, watching the Red Sox end their 86-year drought, celebrate Christmas, and the New Year, but March was sneaking up on me. One day, it pounced on me.

Boxes were being packed. All our stuff was. I was resentful. My room didn’t get packed until three or four days until we moved, and when I refused, my dad said to me, “John, we’re moving, that’s all there is to it.” So, my room got packed.
It’s 2005 now, and we move. Good-byes aren’t super hard, because this summer, we’ll visit here again, so the real good-byes will come when we leave in November. We drive to Stockton, and in our suburban, my sister, Sophia, my mom and me, and my kitten, Midnight. My dad and brother, Jake, get the Budget, the moving truck. Off we go, to Stockton, California…

We had visited Stockton before we had moved, so I knew the people there, making the move less difficult.
But I need to talk about my three feelings—mad, hurt, and jealous. I’ve listed the mad, and the hurt was when I was leaving home. Nothing is ever going to replace Lynden as home, nothing. That’s what hurt. I was leaving home, and it was very, very hard.
Jealous, because when I look at my friends, I am jealous. Of what they have and the life they live. They live in one place, and never moved, and me?
My best friend, Britton Richardson, asked me that I could try out for the Lynden Lions baseball team, it was a High School team. Eagerly I accepted, and I was about to when the bomb dropped, we were moving. So I wouldn’t play baseball with him, or the Lions.
Stockton is one of the worst places I’ve ever lived in. But the church was great. The Youth Group was great. But, I never really got to know them. Oh, there were a few that I got to know pretty well, but for the most part, I didn’t. So in a way, those six months were torture. I felt like an outsider. I never went up to anyone and introduced myself, so I brought this on myself.
Well, as we’re adapting to the church and the city, I’m occupied with school and baseball. Yep, thanks to a member of the church, I got signed to play for Babe Ruth baseball. We played 15 games, but our season ended at 7-8, a disappointment. But I got to play, which was the main thing.
Summer brought many great things. We went up to Washington State, and I got to see my family and friends. I went with my uncle and cousin to see some Mariners games, and they won all three that I attended!
That summer was one of the best in my entire life. I was baptized at the camp that Stockton held yearly, so this was another wonderful thing I can write down. It was great, but then we had to go back, but we would be back again—in November…

The church was glad to see us again, but I still felt lost, and an outsider. Fortunately, we were out soon enough, and I remember during that road trip, I watched the World Series.
This time around, it was even better to be with family and friends. I made the most out of my time, and it was terrific. I had some good talks with them, and when my dad said we were going to visit in April, I couldn’t wait…

But November doesn’t last forever, only 30 days. We were at my grandma’s house in Seattle, and we took off to Taipei, Taiwan. From there, we went to Phnom Penh, Cambodia. I remember flying over Cambodia, and seeing how dry and brown it looked.
I started noticing that my throat was feeling sore, but I thought nothing of it—until we got to our hotel. It was very sore, and I was in misery. I was homesick, suffering from culture shock, and my throat was so sore, I could barely swallow. Those first few days in Phnom Penh were the worst days in my life.
My dad had gotten us a house, so we checked it out, but our shipment was not coming—for three weeks we would have to wait, so that was hard. We were so glad when it finally came! Even though I despised the country, at least the comforts of home eased the pain.
Well, we celebrated Christmas here, but it turned out much better than I thought it would. On Christmas Eve, we opened our presents, and on Christmas Day, we invited everyone down the street. Partners in Progress is just three houses from us, so all the teachers that were there came over, and Christmas Day was very fun. It was one of the best Christmases I had ever had, even though it was in Cambodia.
New Year’s comes and goes, and 2006 rattles on. It’s here are am going to describe some events.
My dad had taken me to the villages a few times, and that was good. I got to see how they lived.
What happened January was something I could never forget…

Joe and Teresa Hickey and Linda Legault came to visit us from Washington. They went to our church in Ferndale, Portal Way Church of Christ. When they had arrived, we went to the Killing Fields.
Now, this was very hard. The Killing Fields were shocking. There was this tower, and inside it, were around 11 or 12 stories of skulls. It was pretty gruesome, considering that the majority of them were cracked or smashed open. I found out later how they got that way.
When we went through the paths, there were big holes. At first I thought that they were mines had exploded, but our guide said that they were dug up graves. I felt sick.
There were signs that said “Mass Graves”, and our guide explained how these people died. Some were put over the grave, and a soldier would take a palm branch and cut their throat open, and let the blood pour, and they left them to die.
There was this tree, and the sign said that they hung a microphone here to drown out the groans of the people.
And of course, nail pegs in the trees. I had no idea what they did—until our guide told us. They Khmer Rouge soldiers, who’s age averaged from 12 to 16 year-s, would take babies, or young children, and bash their heads against the peg. It was very hard to take in.
Well, as we walked to the signs that described these things, we noticed that there were bones in the pathway. There were a few arm bones and leg bones, and one rib bone I saw.
I read the sign, and it talked about Pol Pot and his soldiers. The sign said, “They may have looked like humans, but their hearts were the hearts of demons.” What drove these men to such slaughter?
After that, we had lunch, and my dad, Sophia, and Jake went home while the rest of us went to, I think it’s called Toul Sleay, or something like it. It’s better known as S-21.
When I looked around, I saw three buildings, and there were rooms, and in these rooms one prisoner stayed in, shackled to a bed.
Originally, the prison was a High School, but then it got switched to a torture chamber. There was this one device that was used in school to strengthen the arms or body, but the Khmer Rouge soldiers used it to hang prisoners upside down, until all the blood rushed to their head, and they became unconscious. Then, they would dunk them in headfirst into this filthy water, most likely sewer water, and the smell would wake them up, and the soldiers could continue their interrogation.
There was barbed wire all around the windows of this other building, and the sign said that it was to prevent the prisoners from committing suicide. Man, these
men knew how to torture these poor people.
There were a lot of photographs inside, mostly of the prisoners. Some were graphic, however. One of them had a man without a face…
All these prisoners were stone-faced. There was no hope written in there faces. Nothing.
Well, we continued through, and here were some paintings. They were hard to look at. One was where this man had his wrists shackled to a tub, and the soldiers were letting him drown. Another was where soldiers would toss babies in the air and then shoot them. Or they would bash their heads against the iron pegs in the trees. Some got lashed to death, or had hot pliers rip out pieces of flesh, or would get five jabs of an electric shocker. They had a display of all the torture weapons, like pliers, shovels, electric shockers, guns, etc.
After that, I was numb when we went to the van. I don’t remember going home, I know that we just got there. Thoughts were crowding in my head. Why had Pol Pot and his men done this? What drove men to such madness, such torture? Were they men, or were they monsters? Animals? I don’t know, except that they sure didn’t act like human beings. Probably because they weren’t.
It took a few days to recover from the shock, but I still remember them. It’s hard to forget.

Well, some missionaries come to visit us, from Thailand, Singapore, and Malaysia. There are seven of them, and I enjoyed talking to them. I hoped they enjoyed talking to me. They are really neat people, and I was very glad that I could get to know them. We went to the villages together, and there we saw how poor Cambodia really is. They have almost nothing. I was amazed at the poverty of these people. It was hard to believe.
Well, after we left, my dad said that the next week he and I could go out to the village we just visited. I’ll try and pronounce it, Prey Tick Tongue. We would go out and lay down some drip irrigation, to help grow their plants, and provide food for them. I accepted.
The next day, the seven went out to where I had been a week ago—the Killing Fields and S-21. When they got back, David Allen, who’s a missionary in Thailand, talked to me about it. We discussed it, and I asked him what was harder for him, the Killing Fields, or the prison? He answered, “I don’t know, I’ll have to wait a few days to see.”
We both knew how poor Cambodia was, because of the war and of the Khmer Rouge. Pol Pot was supposed to make Cambodia a better place, but he made it worse! When I look around, and see what’s around me, I think, “He’s responsible for all this!” Nothing can change my mind about it.
After the seven left of Siem Reap, I went with my dad to Prey Tick Tongue. I’ll just call it PTT. Anyways, we helped them lay down a drip irrigation. Kim-Som, who’s the preacher at TNT, another village we visit, came with us, and was our translator. While my dad and I lay down the rubber tubes, which were the irrigation, he built a stand that would hold the bucket. At the bottom of the bucket, there was this filter that would filter out the bad water, and go to the plants. I was glad that we could help them.
After that, they invited to stay and eat. My dad had some of the coconut juice and palm sugar, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to get sick. It’s hard to be polite and consider your health at the same time. Fortunately, they weren’t offended—I hoped.
Here, I realized something. We have so much, and they have so little. You know, as an American, I complained back at home. Yeah, know I’m ashamed of it. Why should I complain? I have a great family, great friends. I have good health, and a roof to sleep under, food to eat. I complained? What? It’s easy to say, “Oh, I want those cool Nike shoes, or the newest video game,” but why should I want those things? I mean, there’s no reason to complain. Those people at the village, they have very little. Food is scarce, the water is bad, their homes are shacks, and they just don’t complain. They make the best of what they have, while I, who am very fortunate to have all these things that I listed, go, “I wish I had this, that, or those.”
I never went through a Khmer Rouge. I wasn’t taken a prisoner. I didn’t get dragged to a field of hell, where I got my throat slit, my head bashed, or go to a prison and slowly die of starvation. I didn’t get bits of flesh torn from my body, or get lashed, electrocuted, or hung upside down, and then getting dunked in filthy muck. I didn’t drown in a tub, shackled to a tub. The Cambodians had to go through all of this. They went through the stabs. They went through the dunking, drowning, being lashed at, or getting their throats slit. They had to endure all these things, while I didn’t. I have everything I could want. True, I’m in a country I don’t want to be in. I’d rather be back in Lynden. There I had it all. But God called us here, and we must answer him. When you read the history, see it with your own eyes, you know why we are here. I know these people are scarred badly by these tragedies. This is amazing, shocking, what happened here 35 years ago. I now thank God for taking care of me, watching out for me, making sure that I have enough. Living here is tough, I know it is. I wish I could be back in Lynden, but we’re here for a purpose. I know that, and understand it.
Well, that just about concludes my little story. I’m not trying to pour guilt on anyone. I’m just trying to make everyone see, that we have a lot, and they have so little. Know that you’re blessed, that God loves you and cares for you. We are so fortunate to not have had to go through this torture. Thank God for his blessings. Thank You.

John T. Sproul Jr.
Age 15
Phnom Penh, Cambodia

Please pray for Cambodia and those Christians who have gone to minister to the least of these.

Love's prayers...Dottie

2006-08-18T11:12:00.000-05:00

"I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered.
"May it be to me as you have said" (Luke 1:38 NIV).
"When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the
Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife"
(Matthew 1:24)

Dr. Steve Allison and I were asked to conduct a workshop for the Pan European Lectures earlier this month. Steve decided to talk about the marriage literature - what we know that makes up a good marriage/family. I was to present the spiritual elements as it applied to expatriates living abroad on a special mission. Until I began this preparation, I never realized how much expatriate evangelists are like Mary and Joseph. Mary and Joseph were two ordinary people called by God to do extraordinary things.

When Mary received her call to be the mother of our Lord, she answered the call and immediately left home to be with her cousin, Elizabeth. Immediately, Elizabeth, upon seeing Mary, confirmed her call by saying, "Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished." She remained with Elizabeth three months. She was with people who affirmed her and encouraged her. Mary was doing what was right. I'm sure Mary was a great help to Elizabeth, as well, as Elizabeth was an older woman bearing her first child. If she stayed until John's birth, she also got to experience the miracle of Zacharias' returned ability to speak. Mary must have been very affirmed in her belief about God's providential care. This would prepare her for what was to come.

When Mary returns to Nazareth, she is three months pregnant. She faces the disbelief of others, even by those who love her. God intervenes once again. Not only has Mary received the call of God, God also calls her betrothed, Joseph. What an extraordinary man - he is immediately obedient to the call. He brings Mary into his home as his wife.

No one knows exactly what God will require of us when we heed His call. I'm sure Mary and Joseph never thought they would do the things they did or go the places they went because they said, "Yes," to God. Like expatriates, Mary gives birth in a strange place, without family nearby. While in strange places, they entertain strangers from every walk of life - shepherds and Eastern kings. They run to foreign countries with their children and learn different languages and stay until they hear God's call that it is time to leave. Expatriate parents can relate to Mary and Joseph not understanding Jesus remaining behind to debate with the religious clergy of the day without regard to their anxiety. Like Jesus, expatriate kids have their feet in different worlds at the same time and understand all of them. Their children, being third culture, learn to appreciate peoples of all cultures. You can see Jesus' great affection for his mother as Jesus begins to live independently of her by fulfilling her request for more wine at a wedding, even though he chides her a bit by saying, "Dear woman, why do you involve me?" (John 2:4). Expatriate parents find they are pretty proud of their kids and know they can do a lot of things other children can't!

Max Lucado has had some wonderful thoughts about Jesus becoming human - that Jesus would become an embryo and develop in a womb and be born in a stable - are amazing facts. This very act of becoming human has placed God's big stamp of approval on familes. He trusted his own son to a human family. Jesus taught a lot of things about family. He said we are not to place it above our love for God, he promised that those who heard his call and left family would have family wherever they go. Yet Jesus always approved of family. He chastised the Pharisees and Lawyers for finding a way to keep their money to themselves instead of using it to care for their parents. His great respect for his mother, caused him to ask his good friend, John, to care for her as he was dying.

Mary and Joseph heard God's call and though they underwent harsh times: giving birth far from home without family, going to the temple at the time of purification alone, even being pursued by the henchmen of a pathological, narcisistic king, who wanted to kill their child, forcing them to flee in the middle of the night to a foreign country, God sent people to surprise and comfort Mary and Joseph. God sent shepherds to celebrate their child's birth. He sent them two older prophets to assure them that they had really heard God's call. He sent kings with gifts (a baby shower?) and His presence was always with them (dreams).

As expatriates on a mission of God, I think if we could ask Mary and Joseph, "Would you rather have had an ordinary life and always stayed home near family instead of this sometimes scandalous, sometimes dangerous, often poor, not sure what tomorrow would bring, sometimes lonely life?" we would hear them say, "We wouldn't trade our lives for anything."

Would you?

God bless and love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-07-18T10:11:00.000-05:00

And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may discern what is best and may be pure and blameless until the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ - to the glory and praise of the Father (Phil. 1:9, 10).

Philippians is one of my favorite books - probably because it's one of the first books I read over and over and over again, trying to gain insight into what Paul was trying to get across to the church and ultimately to me. What did I decide it all meant? Well, I think what I learned is this: I should not think more of myself than I think of others. If only I could be consistent in putting that into practice. If only my love would keep growing more and more and that I could discern what is really true so that I could choose always what is best, especially when it comes to my relationships with other people.

If only I could be like Paul, who put the Philippians's well being above his own desires (Phil. 1:20, 24). His deep desire was that he would never fail in his duty. Oh to be so dedicated to our God!

Of course, Jesus is the perfect example: "of his own free will, [Christ] gave up all he had and took on the nature of a servant...he was humble and walked the path of obedience all the way to death" (2:7, 8). Will I ever comprehend what this really means?

Then there is Timothy, who "is the only one who really shares my [Paul's] feelings and who really cares about you" (2:20). "Everyone else is concerned with his own affairs, not the cause of Jesus Christ," (vs. 21) but not Timothy. Timothy would put the Philippian's welfare above his own. Do I put other's welfare above my own?

Ephaphroditus, who evidently was from Philippi, was returning there with Paul's letter, had nearly died for the cause. Paul urges the Philippians to receive him with joy and to show respect to all such people as he, "because he risked his life and nearly died for the sake of the work of Christ in order to give me [Paul] the help that you yourselves could not give" (2:29, 30). Could I do this?

All of this in contrast to Euodia and Synteche, who could not agree as sisters in the Lord - women who had worked hard with Paul in the Lord were in conflict. Paul begs them to try to agree. Paul asks his faithful partner to try and help them solve their conflict. Was the book of Philippians written because of Paul's concern for these two sisters? Perhaps his love for them compelled him to write what he did. Consider these verses:

Now, the important thing is that your way of life should be as the gospel requires, so that whether I am with you or not I am able to go and see you, I will hear that you are standing firm with one common purpose and with one desire you are fighting together for the faith of the gospel (1:27).

Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may be innocent and pure as God's perfect children, who live in a world of corrupt and sinful people. You must shine among them like stars lighting up the sky, as you offer them the message of life. If you do so, I shall have reason to be proud of you on the day of Christ, because it will show that all my effort and work have not been wasted (2:14-16).

All of us who are spiritually mature should have the same attitude...pay attention to those who follow the right example that we have set for you (3:15, 17).

The spiritually mature have found the pearl of great price and have counted everything else as pure garbage in order to possess it (3:4-10). Our citizenship is in heaven, so we should:

Always be joyful and show a gentle attitude toward everyone. We should remind ourselves that the Lord is coming soon. We shouldn't worry, but in all our prayers ask God for what we need, always asking him with a thankful heart. If we can do that, we will possess God's peace, which is far above human understanding and His peace will keep our hearts and minds safe in union with Christ Jesus (4:4-7).

Paul's final appeal to the Philippians and perhaps to Euodia and Synteche is found in Philippians 4:8 & 9:

In conclusion, my brothers, fill your minds with those things that are good and that deserve praise: things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, and honorable. Put into practice what you learned and received from me, both from my words and from my actions. And the God who gives us peace will be with you.

If we count others better than ourselves as Christ did, as Paul did, as Timothy did and as Epaphroditus did; if we cease to argue and complain; if we are spiritually mature and seek the pearl of great price and count most of what we think is important here in this life as garbage; if we as God's people stand firm together and fight for the gospel together, then perhaps we have learned the lesson Paul wanted us to learn. We will be a people who look for what is good and noble and honorable and lovely and true. We will be a people of peace, who shine like the stars in the universe as we honor our God and our King.

If you are in conflict with someone, consider these things. Blessings on you all!

Love's prayers...Dottie

2006-06-08T11:17:00.000-05:00

Give to Caesar what is Caesar's
And to God what is God's (Matthew 22:21).

Though I do not know any missionary, family or single person, who makes $80,000.00 a year, I feel impelled to pass on the following information concerning a new tax law signed by President Bush on May 17th, 2006. The law is retroactive to January 1. I learned about the law through the newsletter for HR personnel Expatica HR.

New tax ruling hits US expats
The US government has passed a tax law which will increase the tax expat workers from the US will pay. The law will affect tax retroactively and HR departments will need to increase tax withholdings for their expats or risk being fined for not paying enough estimated tax (Expatica HR).

I found the law on the internet and I have placed the text of the law that might affect foreign missionaries below:

Foreign Earned Income Exclusion and Housing Exclusion

Current law, TheTaxBook™ 2005 Edition, page 14-9: A taxpayer may be able to exclude from taxation up to $80,000 of foreign earned income. A taxpayer may also be able to either deduct a portion of housing expenses from income or treat a limited amount of income used for housing expenses as not taxable by the United States [IRC §911]. To qualify for either the exclusion or deduction, the taxpayer must have a tax home in a foreign country and earned income from personal services performed in the foreign country. The exclusion or deduction is reported on Form 2555, Foreign Earned Income.

The $80,000 is adjusted for inflation beginning in 2008 by using the cost-of-living adjustment determined under Section 1(f)(3) for the calendar year in which the taxable year begins, determined by substituting “2006” for “1992” in Section 1(f)(3)(B).

New law, IRC §911: The new law includes the following reforms:

- The $80,000 is adjusted for inflation beginning in 2006 and the cost-of-living adjustment under Section 1(f)(3) is determined by substituting “2004” for “1992” in Section 1(f)(3)(B). Thus, the $80,000 is adjusted to $82,400 for 2006.

- The employer-provided housing exclusion is tied to the foreign earned income exclusion cap. The base housing amount used in calculating the foreign housing cost exclusion in a taxable year is 16% of the amount (computed on a daily basis) of the foreign earned income exclusion limitation (instead of the present law 16% of the grade GS-14, step 1 amount), multiplied by the number of days of foreign residence or presence in that year.

- An objective standard is applied in determining the amount of reasonable housing expenses. The amount of the exclusion is limited to 30% of the maximum amount of a taxpayer’s foreign earned income exclusion. Thus, the maximum amount of the foreign housing cost exclusion in 2006 is $11,536 [($82,400 X 30%) minus ($82,400 X 16%)].

- A stacking rule is applied to ensure that citizens living and working abroad are subject to the same U.S. tax rates as individuals living and working in the U.S. Thus, any income in excess of the exclusion amount is taxed by applying to that income the tax rates that would have been applicable had the individual not taken the foreign earned income exclusion or housing exclusion. For example, a single individual with $82,400 of foreign earned income in 2006 that is excluded under Section 911, and $20,000 in other taxable income after deductions, is subject to tax at the marginal rate of 28% on the $20,000 of excess income.

These new rules are effective for taxable years beginning after December 31, 2005.

I will close today's edition with something something from N.T. Wright's book, Simply Christian.

This brings us to the first of two golden rules at the heart of spirituality. You become what you worship. When you gaze in awe, admiration, and wonder at something or someone, you begin to take on something of the character of the object of your worship. Those who worship money become, eventually, human calculating machines. Those who worship sex become obsessed with their own attractiveness or prowess. Those who worship power become more and more ruthless.
So what happens when you worship the creator God whose plan to rescue the world and put to rights has been accomplished by the Lamb who was slain? The answer comes in the second golden rule: because you were made in God's image, worship makes you more truly human. When you gaze in love and gratitude at the God whose image you were made, you do indeed grow. You discover more of what it means to be fully alive (p. 148).

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-05-30T11:38:00.000-05:00

I will praise you as long as I live,
and in your name I will lift up my hands,
My soul will be satisfied as with the richest
of foods
with singing lips my mouth will praise you.
Psalms 63:4, 5.

I spent last week at Abilene Christian University. I participated in Missions' Focus. We began each morning with worship. There was much thought put into this. I was so blessed to be asked to be a part of this ministry. I met mission committee members from a number of different churches, students, Missions' faculty, and others. Steve Allison and I taught a two hour class each day on marriage and family strengths - a foretaste of our workshop we will hold in August in Brussels at the Pan-European Lectures. Dr. Laura Mae Gardner, who is a lovely, gracious and godly woman, presented each morning. What a pleasure to get to know her better! She is a specialist in Member Care. Different ones of us lead case studies she had prepared in the afternoon and after our afternoon classes, I was one of several on a panel. The panel's job was to take Dr. Gardner's lessons and apply them to churches of Christ. It was a rich time. It was also a fun time. Wednesday evening I attended the Missions' Focus Banquet. The Talent Show afterward was wonderful, especially Yann Opsitch's ability to play three instruments at once! I look forward to next year's Focus.

I'm reading a bunch of books right now. I'm reading E.M.Bounds on Prayer, Simply Christian by N.T. Wright, EatThis Book by Eugene Peterson and to get my Dutch up-to-speed before I go overseas, I'm reading a mystery novel, De Ware Josef, by Elizabeth George. For PBS Mystery watchers, it is an Inspector Lemley book. Of course, I read my Dutch bible - a modern translation - every week. It is kind of refreshing to be able to look at scripture from different translations. I'm dangerous in book stores. When I was in Abilene and in a good book-store, I bought a number of books to read in the future, including John Mark Hick's and Bobby Valentine's new book, Kingdom Come. I attended their class at Tulsa on the topic and so enjoyed it. I find Restoration history fascinating.

But there won't be much book reading this next month. God willing, I'm moving from my apartment to a real house! And I hope God is willing, as I've given notice to my land-lady. I'm not a good shopper - hate it, in fact. Shopping makes me tired! I'm thankful I had such a good realtor who really helped me. She noticed every cracked wall, foundation flaw, roof problem, etc. I went into houses thinking, "Can I have a lot of people over in this house?" "Will I have room for people to come stay?" "How close is this house to the church building? my work?" So having a realtor who knew how to look at a house was a real blessing to me. She taught me a lot. I don't think I'll ever walk into a house again and just begin redecorating in my mind. I'll think - foundation. Is it slab or pier and beam? Does the house have gutters? Is the chimney higher than the highest point of the roof? (smile) I finally found the right one and it has few flaws! It is five minutes to the church building, which is important to me, and adds only 10 more minutes to my commute to work. I've actually gotten used to driving on the freeway. It is now my first choice - even though I have learned all the alternate routes to almost everywhere I need to go.

One of our MRN office staff and his wife left for Africa yesterday. To keep up with Sam Shewmaker and his wife, Nancy, you can read his http://mac.com/samshew2/Web/Impact%20AFRICA.html. He will be travelling the African way - on foot, by bus and by boat. Sam and Nancy will be traveling with national church planters from Kenya and Tanzania. Sam bought everyone a sleeping bag, as they will often stay in a brother or sister's house and sleep on their floor. Pray for Sam and Nancy and the African church planters. May God guide them to ripe fields that are white unto harvest and keep them safe from the Evil One. Please pray for their health and stamina.

I leave you today with words from E.M. Bounds:

Prayer in the Old Testament is called wrestling. Conflicts and skill and strenuous, exhaustive effort are involved. In the New Testament we have the terms striving, laboring frequently, fervent, effectual, agony: all indicating that when intense effort is put forth, difficulties are overcome (p. 72).

The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous person avails much (James 5:16)

Won't you struggle in prayer for our missionaries today?

Love's Prayers...Dottie

2006-03-27T14:40:00.000-06:00

Today, I want to share this compelling story from Kenya with you. Hollye Conway has given me permission to print this. When I first read this email, I was reminded of the scripture, "in as much as you have done it to the least of these ... you have done it unto me." Here is Hollye's description of her Mondays!

I first met baby t. when she was 3 weeks old...the large, bright whites of her eyes stood out in contrast to her ebony skin...she was tiny, scrawny, but her eyes would find yours and lock.

usually when you pick up a tiny baby your instinct is to enfold it close to your heart... I did not have the slightest inclination to do so with baby t...it was more like an awkward 10 year old boy having to hold a baby in front of his friends...kinda at a distance from his body with his head turned the opposite direction... i love babies,...i love to cuddle babies ... but this baby reeked, this baby was swaddled in her mother's old sweatshirt, and a piece of cloth with stains from everything she had come in contact with over the past 3 weeks ... remember no diapers ... & .. she had not been bathed.

why not bathed, you ask? ..."bases" or trash heaps where her mother lives do not have the luxury of a bathtub, much less any water tap of any kind ... the closest water source would be the raw sewage that runs past the base... also her mother has to beg for food, coins, etc for survival ..which looks more pathetic, a filthy baby or a clean baby?

a ritual began that day...darlene, mama dennis and i took baby t, heated up water, bathed her, bought her a diaper and a little clean outfit...now each monday baby t. gets a bath, lotion and clean clothes...now we hold her close, kiss on her little cheeks and whisper love messages into her ear ...
as she contently sucks her fingers ... baby t. is 4 months old now and our ritual continues...

not a week has gone by though when we have removed the putrid, stained, crusty clothes from her body and placed her in the warm sudsy water that i have not thanked Jesus for doing that very same favor to me over the past week ... removing that odorous, repulsive garb of filth that makes me want to squirm out of it... and placing His clean robe of righteousness upon my undeserving shoulders...

to grasp the full impact of gratitude I feel each week, you would have to join me one monday to watch the baby t. transformation.... you are welcome!
Hollye

2006-02-24T09:26:00.000-06:00

Anyone who does not take up his cross
and follow me is not worthy of me.
Whoever finds his life will lose it,
and whoever loses his life for my sake
will find it. Matthew 10:38b, 39.

I've just returned from the ACU lectures. I attended a few sessions on spiritual formation led by Randy Harris and a number of sessions of the Restoration Forum, which was a part of the lectureship this year. The Forum was a demonstration in Grace. I have been encouraged on many fronts. Today and tomorrow I will attend the Teacher of Missions workshop in Arlington, Texas. How blessed I am.

I'm close to completing three books, The Barbarian Way by Erwin Raphael McManus, Revolution by George Barna and Red Moon Rising by Peter Grieg and Dave Roberts. Red Moon Rising is a book about how lives have been transformed by 24/7 prayer vigils, Revolution is a report about the millions of believers who have found alternatives to the established church. The Barbarian Way is a call to revolution against 'civilized' Christianity. I want to share an excerpt with you from this book, pages 48 and 49.

The original call of Jesus was so simple, so clean, so clear: "Follow Me." He wants us to surrender our lives in Him and follow Him into the unknown. And if it means a life of suffering, hardship, and disappointment, it will be worth it because following Jesus Christ is more powerful and more fulfilling than living with everything in the world minus Him. Have we forgotten this? Have we become so refined and so civilized that the benefits of our faith have become more precious and more valuable to us than the Benefactor of our faith?

I wonder how many of us are in that place of John the Baptist, at that crucible where God is asking, "Are you willing to lose everything on My Behalf to gain everything I desire for you? Rather than living a long life, are you willing to live a live worth living?

I feel after reading these books the same way I felt when I finished reading Camp's Mere Christianity:. Have I ever been a Christian? Thank God for His grace. These are good books - not too long - and worth your time.

I pray all of you are feeling God's urging to keep Him first, to demonstrate that belief through raw faith as you pray for His wisdom and His strength to keep on keeping on. May God bless you in your walk with Him, whereever that takes you.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-02-01T15:52:00.000-06:00

Dear Missionary Bloggers out there:

I'm putting some materials on missionary care for churches together right now and haven't had much time to put into writing a good article for this blog. There are some others out there, however, who have spent some time thinking about marriage and about rearing children of faith. I am recommending those sites to you today.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-01-23T16:20:00.000-06:00

Children, obey your parents in the Lord,
for this is right. “Honor your father and
mother” – which is the first commandment
with a promise – “that it may go well with
you and that you may enjoy long life on the
earth.”
Fathers, do not exasperate your children;
instead, bring them up in the training and
instruction of the Lord.
Ephesians 6:1-4

The Power of a Father’s Blessing, a recent article in Christianity Today, stimulated a little research on my part. On my desk now are six or seven books on missionary care, a couple of dissertations, and four journals I have kept over the years. Some of the data is old and some very recent, but it all says the same thing: father presence and father approval, father warmth and father acceptance are important in the life of a child. Children being reared in a country other than his/her passport need caring fathers. These children are called Third Culture Kids (TCKs). Fathers are important. I often wonder if fathers are not more important to TCKs/MKs.

When parents make the decision to take their family to a foreign land to do mission work, they are also deciding that they will be raising TCKs/MKs. The missionary’s family life can facilitate ministry or his/her family life can hinder ministry. MK-CART/CORE (Missionary Kid - Consultation and Research Team/Committee on Research and Endowment), formed in 1987, has completed some important research studies: 1) Boarding School Personnel Study (BSP), 2) Adult MK Study (AMK) and 3) the Missionary Family Profile Study (MFP). Some of the results of those studies will be used in this article.

What we know from research is that father absence is not a good thing.

1. Fatherless children are five times more likely to live in poverty than children living with both parents.
2. Women reared in single-parent households engage in sexual activity outside of marriage much more often than young women reared in intact families.
3. Teen boys from one-parent families are almost twice as likely to father a child out of wedlock as teen boys reared in intact families.
4. Young males, raised without a father, are almost twice as likely to engage in criminal behavior.
5. Children reared in father-absent families have substantially higher rates of mental illness.
6. Youths attempting or completing suicide are much more likely to come from father-absent homes than youths from intact families.

Lewis, Dodd, and Tippens found that parents who spent quality time in quantity with their children reared children who were more likely to refrain from alcohol and drug abuse and to practice sexual abstinence. When children perceive that their parents really care about them and they experience the family as being close, abstinence rates are high even if both parents work. Abstinence rates are highest when the father is perceived as a caring, attentive parent (Dying to Tell, p. 81). “When parents fail to bless their children with a profound sense of worth, lasting harm, which transcends generations, can occur (Shattering the Silence, p. 27). These authors suggest that parents need to be emotionally available, approachable, and honest with their children.

It’s no different for missionary kids. MKs who score high on scales of well being have parents who

1. Involve children in making family decisions and grant children freedom
to engage in their own decision-making when it is appropriate.
2. Encourage children to explore new ideas and hold their own points of view.
3. Spend time with children and make them feel that what they do is important.
4. Create an atmosphere conducive to children’s confiding in their parents.
5. Support their children even when they make poor choices.
6. Explain the rules and consider the child’s point of view when making rules.
7. Communicate openly in the family
(MK CART/CORE).

“For children to survive, for children to succeed, we must be present, and we must bless them. We must say good words to them. We must say good words over them. And we must say good words about them. Without affirmation, it is almost impossible to make it in this world. Each and every child deserves to hear: ‘You are my beloved son or daughter. I thank God for you. I cherish you. You are God’s remarkable creation. I will always, always love you" (The Gospel According to Generation X, p. 177).

One of the best things about mission work is the fact that families tend to spend more time with each other than church families back home do. They also tend to create a closer, more intense friendship circle with their team mates than USA church families form with other church families. Missionary children experience not only a close family relationship, but a strong sense of community and a sense of belonging to something important - something missionaries and missionary kids miss desperately when they return "home." Missionary children see their fathers as very important people doing very important work. Those children who identify with their fathers and who feel loved by them experience a positive strong sense of self.

References:
Pollock, David C and Ruth Van Reken, The Third Culture Kid Experience: Growing Up among Worlds. Yarmouth, Maine: Intercultural Press, 1999, p. 188.
Andrews, Leslie A., Ph.D. (Editor), The Family in Mission: Understanding and Caring for Those Who Serve. Palmer Lake, Colorado: Mission Training International, 2004.
Lewis, David K., Carley H. Dodd, and Darryl Tippens, Dying to Tell: The Hidden Meaning of Adolescent Substance Abuse. Abilene, Texas: ACU Press, 1992.
Lewis, David, Carley Dodd and Darryl Tippens, Shattering the Silence: Telling the Truth about Kids and Sexuality. Abilene, Texas: ACU Press, 1989
Andrews, p. 242.
Lewis, David K., Carley H. Dodd and Darryl L. Tippens, The Gospel According to Generation X. Abilene, Texas: ACU Press, 1995/

2006-01-17T11:52:00.000-06:00

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow
we will go to this or that city, spend a year
there, carry on business and make money." Why
you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.
What is your life? You are a mist that appears
a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you
ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will we will
live and do this or that." As it is, you boast
and brag. All such boasting is evil. Anyone, then,
who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do
it, sins. James 4:13-17

Today's headlines - Powers Disagree Over Iran Crisis - Ivory Coast's Peace Under Threat - Pluto Mission Ready for Lift-Off - Israelis Kill West Bank Militant and today's interstate Amber Alert signs alerting travelers of yet another kidnapping and today's email I sent out concerning the death in Iraq of Dustin Kendall, son of missionaries in Estonia and brother of a missionary in the Ukraine - are much more noteworthy than my news. None-the-less I have decided to post an email I sent out this morning to my many friends.

Dear friends,

I sent my letter of resignation to Wayne Baker, York College President, two weeks ago. The president sent a very kind email about my resignation to faculty, staff and board members yesterday. Now that the decision is final, I find I am grieving. My memories of York College are good. I loved every part of my work there. I will miss everything about the college - my friendships, the students, my teaching and counseling, and working in the Master's Apprentice Program. York College is a school that emphasizes missions. One fourth of the student body is involved in some type of mission work each year. Let's Start Talking always has a lot of students who go out each year and MAP does its part, too. For me, one of the best things that happened was the establishment of the Thomas N. Schulz Chair of Missions. I'm so glad that happened before Tom died. It meant so much to him to know missions would always be a part of York College. Thank you to all of you who receive this email who have or continue to contribute to this. God is wonderful and I feel He has blessed me in indescribable ways at York College. As part of the faculty at York, emails sent to me there have been directed to MRN. I don't know how long they will continue this now that I've resigned. Those of you who have been using my York email address, dmschulz@york.edu need to delete this address and change my email address to dottie.schulz@MRNet.org.

I will be selling my house in York and looking for a house here. Though none of the children have lived at home for years, this has been hard on my children as the house on Thompson Avenue in York has been the only place they could call home since we sold our house in The Netherlands, where their true 'heart home' is. They are doing their own grieving. I've invited them to come to York when I move and to take whatever is dear to them at that time.

My focus is now on my work at Missions Resource Network. I know in my heart that this is where I am supposed to be. No one should ever take anything for granted. One should always say, "if the Lord wills," but especially at my age I am aware of the need to place every plan into God's hand. All of these plans will take place only if it is His will. I will work at MRN for as long as my work can be done with integrity. I am praying that my latter days will be more fruitful for Him than my early years.

My best to you all. I covet your prayers.

Though this is not Headline News, it is a real change in thinking for me. I've already changed my blogger profile. All of this will occur if it is God's will.

Please remember the Kendalls in prayer. Losing a child under any circumstances is tragic.

Love's prayers...Dottie

2006-01-12T16:37:00.000-06:00

Lord, Teach us to pray.

I read a great article on prayer. I recommend it to you.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2006-01-09T15:46:00.000-06:00

And whoever welcomes a little child
like this in my name welcomes me.
Matthew 18:6a

Some Suggestions For Assisting Reentering Young Missionary Children

Developed for Members of Receiving Churches by Sheila Austin – 2000
(Used with permission)

Parents fom the home congregation with children of similar ages as the missionary family could correspond with the missionary family prior to their reentry to begin the get-acquainted process.

Teachers of the Bible classes which missionary children (MKs) will attend could send a picture of their Bible class to the missionary family; then obtain close-up pictures of the MKs (from their parents) and post them in their respective classes so the children will recognize them.

Children in primary and elementary classes could write individual notes of welcome to the MKs; the preschool children could draw pictures of the church building or their classroom.

Use the bulletin boards lavishly to portray the returning family together and individually (close-ups) and make them feel welcome upon return.

Your child might select something of his or her own (not purchased, e.g. as favorite book, game or toy) to give as a welcoming gift to the MKs.

One family with children of corresponding ages might be the liaison to help the children get acquainted with others of their age group.

Teens might offer to entertain the children while the missionary family unpacks.

Parents of the receiving church might invite MKs to join their family for a trip to the zoo, picnic or park.

Teens from the receiving church could ask MKs to help them bake cookies and take to shut-ins. This would allow the shut-ins to welcome the reentering family, also.

Parents from the receiving church should encourage their children to invite the MKs into their home, and to interact with the MKs regularly.

Imagine what would be the most helpful for you if you were returning to the States with similar aged children – then do that for the missionaries.

The gifts of time and listening will be appreciated more by the missionary family than the gifts of things and money.

2006-01-01T13:59:00.000-06:00

"Blessed are the dead who die
in the Lord from now on."
"Yes," says the Spirit, "they will
rest from their labor, for their deeds
will follow them."
Revelation 14:13

Six years ago today on January 1, 2000, Thomas Neil Schulz died at 5:25 p.m. He saw wondrous things that day and he told me as much as he was allowed.

Tom told me that morning when he woke up that he was living in two realities. Later in the day he asked me if he was special. I asked why. He said, "that I should have all this!" I told him, "Yes, you are very special. You are a child of God, saved by grace." He looked up at the ceiling in two directions, as if to check out to see if what I said was correct, nodded and smiled at me and said, "Yes." Those were his last words.

Missionaries do what they do in the world for this very reason: that as many as possible may live and die in the Lord. They are blessed!

Love's prayers,
Dottie

2005-12-23T10:11:00.000-06:00

Sing and make music in your heart to the
Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father
for everything, in the name of the Lord Jesus.
Eph. 5:20

With thanksgiving I remember my mother-in-law, Kathrine Bender Schulz (Mom), who was born in Balsar, Russia. My father-in-law (Dad), Heinrich (Henry) was born in the states, but just barely. My in-laws were German Russian. Their Prussian grandparents went to Russia when Katherine the Great was Czarina. They lived in the Russian Steppes near the Volga River and were known as the Volga Germans. Many German Russians immigrated to the states and settled mostly in Eastern Colorado, Kansas, Nebraska, North and South Dakota and Minnesota - lured to the states with the promise of free land. Dad's uncle immigrated to Argentina - again the lure of making good. Mom and Dad grew up speaking German. Their schooling was sparse. Dad had four years of schooling - Mom had six years. Mom helped her dad learn enough English to become an American citizen. Because of the Americanization Movement, at that time, if the father of an immigrant family became a citizen, the whole family was granted citizenship.

Debts were sin. The family had borrowed money to come to the states and that money had to be paid back. Grandpa worked for the railroad and Grandma took in washing. When Mom was 12 she went to live with a family as a house-keeper. She cleaned the house, washed the clothes and cooked. She made a quarter a week. On Sunday Mom would go home to her family and lay that quarter on the kitchen table.

When I was 18 years old, I married Tom and became part of this extended German-Russian family. One week after I married, Mom took me to meet "the family." No English was spoken. At one point, Aunt Theresa said, "Let's speak English so Dottie can understand." but aunt Idt said, "Ach, Let har larn somesing." I was finally able to understand conversations after I had been in Holland. (Dutch is not German, but I can understand German. Germans, however, usually cannot understand Dutch. It is too gutteral!)

Christmas was a nice holiday time with the Schulz clan. It was never extravagant, but the food was always luscious. Mom was known as the best cook in the county, even when she only had a wood-burning stove to cook on. We ate kraut runzas and vereniky and hoolapsi and kugen. I learned to fix all the dishes and now my girls cook them all, too. When we lived overseas, I bought a German cook book, but none of the dishes Mom cooked were in the book. I found them in a Russian cook book, though. What Mom couldn't do with noodle dough!

One time Mom told me that as a child she had always wanted a teddy bear, but there was never enough money for such an extravagance. That year when we went shopping for Christmas, I remembered what Mom had said about always wanting a teddy bear. I found a medium size, soft cuddly bear at a department store and on a whim, bought it. I always knew Mom liked me and approved of me, but when she saw that bear, she jumped up, grabbed me, hugged me and kissed me - a pretty spontaneous act for a stolid German woman whom I never saw cry! From then on, that teddy bear had a special place in the living room. It moved with Mom and Dad from the farm to town. When Mom went into the Care Home, the bear went, too. Giving Mom that bear changed Mom's and my relationship, too. From that day on, I was Mom's dear friend. I got to hear special secrets and the hugs seemed to be more special.

I wonder if we appreciate Christmas like Mom and Dad did. Getting an orange at Christmastime was a special treat. At my house growing up Mama and Daddy saw to it that we had an orange and some nuts in our stockings. Under the tree was a special treat - a real cocoanut, which my Daddy would crack open on Christmas day. What special memories.

Those special people are all gone now. Mom was buried seven years ago today. My happiest memory of her was seeing her face when she got a teddy bear at age 80. Thank you, Mom, for teaching me what gratefulness looks like.

Many of you who read this blog will experience a multi-cultural Christmas. Treasure that time. I know many of you will adopt many of these customs and pass them down to your families. I hope your Christmas memories are as happy as mine. Use this special time to make a memory you can recall with joy someday!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Dottie

2005-12-22T16:55:00.000-06:00

I sent this urgent email out at 9 a.m. this morning.

My dear Prayer Warriors,

Got a call this morning at 6:30 a.m. for prayer. Kyle Holton, missionary in LaChinga, Mozambique: http://www.yaomission.org/, is gravely ill. For several days he has been unable to lift his head. Kyle's wife, Ginger, took him to an Indian doctor who gave him very strong malaria medication, even though the blood tests were negative for malaria. The medication is making Kyle throw up. Kyle and Ginger, who have two small children are alone. Their team mates are in the states.

Their sponsoring church has asked Ginger to arrange for Kyle to be evacuated to South Africa, where he can receive proper medical treatment. The evacuation plane will not arrive until tomorrow. If Kyle has cerebral malaria - tentative diagnosis - it could be fatal. Cerebral malaria is the worse form of malaria. Prayer requests: 1) pray that the medication Kyle is receiving is the right medication; 2) pray for Ginger's endurance - she has been caring for Kyle night and day without help for several days, plus she has two very young children to care for. She has another night to go through alone; 3) pray the plane is large enough to hold not only Kyle, but the whole family.

Please call your prayer ministries at your local churches and ask them to pray for Kyle and Ginger. Pray for Kyle's extended family - this has been a year of many losses for them. Please get on your knees for this family. I am thankful I have you to call on when prayer is needed. Our God is able!

Around 2 p.m. I sent this email out:

Dear Prayer Warriors,

Your prayers are being heard. Some Australian Baptist missionaries heard of the Holton's difficulties. They came by and took the boys, Asher and Eli, for the afternoon and part of the evening. Ginger was able to pack. The boys are now asleep (it is night time in Mozambique now). Kyle was able to keep down some of the pain medication long enough for it to begin to work and was able to take a warm shower, which helped him feel better. I thank God they had water and that it was warm. That within itself is a small miracle! Though Kyle is still extremely ill, he is no longer in "screaming" pain.

Aviation Fellowship, who is flying to Mozambique to help them evacuate, has an apartment on their compound in Nels Pruitt, South Africa (north of Johannesburg), for Ginger and the boys to stay in. Also on the compound is a hospital that specializes in malaria. God be praised!

I am grateful to God for better news. I am grateful to you for praying for this couple. Kyle and Ginger thank us for praying.. Ginger said that she feels "at peace." She believes it is because of your prayers. This ordeal is not over. Please continue to pray.

And shortly after 5 p.m. I put these thoughts together:

I listened to a great series of sermons this last year called Prayer for Dummies – 12 in all. It made me think. However, I’ve been as affected by the “off-the-cuff” remarks about prayer made by my preacher and others I’ve come to know this year as I have been by sermons. I find that I pray more than I used to. I have a prayer notebook and five pages of it are filled with names of people I pray for. One page in my notebook is filled with answers to prayers. The rest of the notebook is filled with my personal notes, some personal written-out prayers and some articles on prayer - still, I wonder if I have the kind of faith that prayer calls for.

Yes, God has answered many of my prayers. Some answers to prayer have been so personal, I could never share them with anyone, and it is those personal answers to prayer that have convinced me that God has had compassion on me – on me. When I think about it, I tear up. I know a God who answers prayers.

But, God hasn’t answered all my prayers, even when I prostrated myself, wept, and begged. I decided a long time ago that God is God and I am not! So, when I pray, I do not presume that I know how God will answer my prayer. That makes me wonder if I’m a doubter – perhaps a person who does not pray in faith.

A missionary wrote the following in his blog: “I was called upon to go with some other men to pray for an old man who had dislocated his right femur over a year ago!! They said he “broke” it but I’m wondering if it were truly broken how he’d be doing as well as he was (walking with a walking stick). They tried all kinds of traditional methods of healing (cannot imagine how many voodoo sacrifices have been made), but someone told the man we were having our meeting today, so he asked for prayers. Believe me, I was shocked upon hearing the awful story and then seeing him “flex” his upper thigh in a highly abnormal position, and then seriously perplexed how this prayer team might pray for him…then who might the team decide should pray? Yep, me! Lord, forgive my unbelief, and do a miracle in that man’s leg anyway for the sake of your glory!!”

I feel the same frustration. Perhaps I am too western – too educated! Yet, I find I trust God with my future, my life or death more than I ever have before. I know I live with a lot less fear than I used to. But I don’t claim verses for myself and I don’t presume God will answer my prayers as I want. Perhaps, to pray is to have faith.

Please keep praying for Kyle and Ginger. He seems better because the pain medication is working, but his condition has not changed. Please pray with as much faith as you can and I will pray with as much faith as I can. Lord, help our unbelief.

2005-12-08T14:40:00.000-06:00

Who am I, O Sovereign Lord,
and what is my family
that you have brought me this far...

How great you are, O Sovereign Lord!
There is no one like you, and
there is no God but you...
2 Samuel 7:18 and 22

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR:

That God has been good to me is an understatement this year! This has been one of the happiest years of my life. I feel that God has used me in wondrous ways. Working at Missions Resource Network has been a great joy

At York College the best part of my day was chapel, especially when it was a Praise Chapel. The best part of my day here is our daily devotional. Invariably I get to hear what my colleagues are working on and doing. We pray about everything. I work with the most wonderful people! They are supportive of me and any one of them would step up to the plate to be there for me, should I need them. In this ministry I also get to hear about the good things happening in our brotherhood. Most of you who know me well, know that my passion is missions. That passion is getting fed in this job. Missions Resource Network has blessed many and has been blessed by many.

Another thing that makes this year so special is all the ways I have been able to grow intellectually and emotionally. I’ve attended different conferences and spoken at a few, written different research papers and general articles and worked personally with different missionaries and congregations. That means I have had time to read and to study and to learn new things. What a joy! That also means I have been able to interact with others one-on-one and in groups. I am amazed that no matter where I go, there are those God-arranged-appointments I didn’t know I would have. These coincidences bless my life is such surprising ways!

I struggled with different things when I was trying to make the decision of whether to move to Texas and take this job or not. Could I leave my house? Those of you who have visited me know how beautiful my home in Nebraska is. It's one of those lovely, big old-fashioned homes built in 1923. Could I leave teaching? I love students and love being with them. Being in a classroom brings me a special kind of joy. Could I leave the Counseling Center? Helping people solve their problems and seeing young people grow made me feel glorious! I spent many years jumping through the educational and legal hoops to get those licenses that hung on my wall. Could I give that up? When I went in to resign from York College to work at Missions Resource Network, I left with a leave of absence. That was a beautiful gift! When I moved to Texas, I literally walked out of my house and left it as it was – furniture, china, crystal, silverware, wall clocks, sheets on the bed, etc., everything is still there. I have a lovely young couple house-sitting and taking care of all my things. Right now they are busy shoveling my walks! I followed my son’s advice. He suggested I look upon my sojourn in Texas as a camping trip. I just brought what I needed, along with personal pictures and mementos. These decisions have literally allowed me to grow spiritually. And that has been my greatest blessing for the year 2005.

My small apartment, which I think is erg gezellig, an almost untranslatable Dutch expression which means cozy, homey, comfortable, welcoming, hospitable, lovely, warm, gracious, etc., has been just right for me. I was feeling it was a little small one day when I was expecting 12 people to come by for the evening, when it occurred to me that I raised four children in an apartment this size when we lived in Holland. We even had other people live with us from time to time in that small apartment and it all worked out. I had to admit, I had gotten spoiled. One of my better decisions when I moved here was not to get cable. Of course, without cable, I miss my “most favoritest” program, Monk, but Steve Moore, who used to teach at York and who now teaches at ACU, has kept me in Monk tapes, as it’s one of his “most favoritest” programs, too. Thank you, Steve!!! Of course, I still watch Mystery – my other favorite program. So, with little to watch, I have had time to read lots of books – about one a week. I listen to tapes, especially sermons, and I have spent a lot more time in Bible study. At York I was heavily involved in the Master's Apprentice Program. Here I take my turn at facilitating a weekly neighborhood Bible study, am involved with the prayer ministry, and am getting involved with the peacemaker ministry here.

My life here is literally filled with good things. I took some returned missionaries with me to corporate worship one Wednesday night. After services we walked around trying to find someone they knew, but as we walked I began introducing them to people I knew. That night I realized how many people here I know now and how many of them are very dear to me! I feel so blessed! When I first came here and walked into the huge building where the body of Christ meets, I literally drew in my breath. I thought to myself that I would never make it here, but just the opposite has happened. I have never been so happy. I think people get tired of hearing me say, “I love my church,” but I do. I have never been so well fed, so encouraged, and so proud to be a part of the body of Christ. Everyone, regardless of background, is welcome here. There are countless ways to help people here, also. This body of believers really believes that the grace of God is bigger than any sin or mistake and they also believe that the power of God is bigger than our limits (these are words out of my preacher’s mouth). As a result I pray more, I study God’s word more, and I reach out to others more. This has been my greatest blessing in being here. I would not trade the spiritual growth I have experienced this year for any of the things I left behind.

This is getting to be a long Christmas/year end letter. I have not told you anything about my children and grandchildren. Well, they are all wonderful and I’m looking forward to being with them all this Christmas season. My grandchildren are now 17, 14, and 3. My Dutch children will be arriving in the states on Christmas eve and I can hardly wait! Steve and my grand-dog are driving down from Nebraska for Christmas and of course, my Texas children will be around. My apartment will struggle to hold us all – but it will! The walls will sing with joy. Who am I that I should be so blessed? 2 Samuel 7:18.

To all you beautiful people whom I love, who seek and save the lost in many different areas of the world, I wish you all a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Blessed New Year.

God is great and greatly to be praised.

Love’s prayers,

Dottie

2005-12-01T16:46:00.000-06:00

What I Wrote

Looked at Mike Cope's blog this morning - probably the most read blog of anyone I know - and saw his congratulatory note to Rick Atchley for receiving the Alumnus of the Year award last night. I was privileged to be in the audience and it truly was wonderful! There is something so joyous and good in seeing someone receive honor, especially if it is deserved.

Then I read the comments to Mike's blog and a dad asked us to respond to his daughter's blog. His daughter needed encouragement. So I went to her blog and read it...and this is what I wrote:

I don't understand it either, Jenny. My daughter lost four babies and all I could do was hold her and cry with her. My best friend lost her sister and her sister left two young children. All I knew to do was cry with her. When my son died the verse people would quote to me was Romans 8:28. I hated that verse. I lived in Job, Psalms and Ecclesiastes a long time. I read every book that explained why God acted as He did and found them all unsatisfactory. Thought I might write my own someday, but I still don't have anything better to say. I will tell you that who I am today was forged in fire back then. I don't understand this God, but I love Him. I finally had to decide that God is all powerful and that He is also good. That is called faith...and if the mountains fall, the earth trembles and the sea roars, I decided to trust Him - no matter what.

Jenny, I am praying for you and your daughter - your whole family. I am so sorry that you are experiencing this gripping pain that is so unexplainable - the loss so real.

God is good. I am convinced of that! Going to Mississippi tomorrow. I have never been there. I am conducting a Church Reentry Workshop. The church in Oxford wants to bring home their missionaries right. I'm really excited.

In two minutes I'm leaving the office to go watch my granddaughter play soccer for Dallas Christian. She's really very good!

May God bless you all.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-11-22T08:39:00.000-06:00

"I tell you the truth," Jesus said to them,
"no one who has left home or wife or brothers
or parents or children for the sake of the
kingdom of God will fail to receive many times
as much in this age and, in the age to come,
eternal life."
Luke 18:29, 30.

This Thursday, most people in the United States will be celebrating Thanksgiving. Not being a commercial holiday, advertising pays it little attention. The ads and decorations for Christmas are already in the stores. Thankfully, however, Thanksgiving is still an important family tradition.

It seems the Greek language has a lot of words for our one word, love. Someone once explained to me that the Greek word for family love is Storge. As human beings we are attached to our families either negatively or positively or sometimes both. It is this storge love that keeps us coming together at special times with the hope that we will feel loved and connected with family once again.

On the mission field families are very close to each other. The circumstances of living in a foreign environment increase closeness. The pressure to have children involved in everything from little league to ballet is less. There seems to be more emphasis on family in many other countries. Families are allowed to spend more time with each other. Leisure time is allowed and guilt is heaped on people who refuse leisure rather than on those who work only 40 hours a week. Japan would be the exception to these statements, of course.

This family closeness often gets shattered once an expatriate returns to the states. Family meals are missed because of children's after school activities - because of work - because of church work (See Breakpoint's Beyond Thanksgiving). This is one of the things that makes missionary family reentry difficult. Having people over for a meal doesn't happen much anymore. If there is any hospitality it occurs in a restaurant - see John Mark Hick's latest entry on Samaritan Hospitality. This is another reason Thanksgiving with family is so special in the United States. It's one of the three times in a year when the whole family might get together - when storge love might happen.

So whether you are in the states or you are in another country and can't celebrate this American holiday until Saturday, enjoy your family. Make joyful family memories. Eat together. Invite someone without family to join you. Count your blessings. Bless others and allow others to bless you.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Dottie

2005-11-16T21:30:00.001-06:00

Getting Caught

Tonight at the Summit at Richland Hills, Jeff Garrett, a recovering alcoholic, who knows the Lord well, delivered a wonderful lesson on Getting Caught. Getting caught did six things for him:

1) Getting caught helped him confess his sin. Psalm 32:4,5
2) Getting caught made him want to stop. I Cor. 15:3,4
3) Getting caught helped him avoid more serious consequences.
4) Getting caught helped him begin the road to recovery.
5) Getting caught helped him understand the importance of relationships.
6) Getting caught lead him to a greater understanding of God's love and forgiveness.
Psalm 103:8-14

It was a beautiful testimony. When I taught at Friends University in the adult education program (one of the hats I wore), we had many, many recovering alcoholics in our classes. I loved them all. They were the most honest, most transparent, most real people I ever met. They were a delight to teach. Adult Ed was their second chance to make something out of their lives and they studied and worked hard.

There is one young woman I wish I could reach who has made alcohol and drugs her life. This is the young woman driving the car that struck my son when he was crossing the street many years ago. Today is the anniversary of my son, Paul's death. We buried him on my birthday. I missed him tonight. But tonight, I also thought about that young woman who was drinking and smoking pot and driving. She was only 17 years old that fateful day. Paul was only 21. Jesus died for them both.

If you know this young woman, see if you can get her to come home. Jesus wants her to come home and so do I. I'm so happy Jeff came home. He blessed me tonight.

Love's Prayers,

Dottie

2005-11-13T14:07:00.000-06:00

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?…No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us"
Rom. 8:35, 37.

The following will be placed on the Missions Resource Network Website soon.

Avian Flu Threat

A major public health concern being raised worldwide is the possibility of a pandemic resulting from an outbreak of avian or “bird” flu. This could have significant implications for missionaries and their families living throughout the world. Dr. Dan Blazer is a psychiatrist at Duke University and a member of the Task Force for Missionary Care associated with Missions Resource Network. Part of Dr. Blazer’s work is with the U.S. Armed Forces. He recently asked Dr. Roger Gibson, Executive Secretary for the Armed Forces Epidemiological Board, several questions regarding concerns about which missionaries and churches should be aware. We want to share his replies in order to raise your awareness about potential responses in the event of worldwide outbreak of avian flu.

What advice would you give missionaries?

In addition to the typical preventive medicine measures (wash your hands, avoid crowds and visibly sick people, eat healthy, etc.), they should stay informed by listening to the radio/TV, website. They should know up front that some folks transmit influenza before showing symptoms. Therefore they are not fully risk free if they avoid sick people. And they could intentionally transmit the disease to others. Restricting their movements is very wise.

I would recommend having about a month's worth of food and essentials stored away, just in case. In a true pandemic, you can plan on seeing the country's infrastructure implode...stores closed, buses and trucks not delivering, maybe break downs in water and electricity supplies.

Would you attempt to evacuate missionaries ASAP back to the US? What would be the concerns about them bringing the flu to the US?

Wearing my clinical hat, given the level of care required for those who contract the current virulent version of avian flu, I would recommend return to the US or at least movement to a non-avian flu area where good medical care exists. Epidemiologically, I would prefer everyone stayed in place and have optimal treatment provided for them. The best bet would be to contact the American Embassy and get the latest information on movement restrictions. More than likely those returning to the US from an area where avian flu is being transmitted from human-to-human will have some form of restriction of movement imposed upon them once they arrive in the US. It is possible, but currently unlikely, that they would be denied entry into the US. It is slightly more likely that airlines will refuse to fly to infected areas. They should be prepared for that eventuality and comply fully with the authorities.

Should there be some backup medications, such as Tamiflu, on site for missionaries to begin to take?

Yes. Absolutely. For two reasons. First taking Tamiflu during the first 48 hours of illness has been shown to reduce the severity and length of illness. More importantly, Tamiflu dramatically reduces viral shedding. Finally, if they start taking Tamiflu as a preventive in the face of the outbreak, they can greatly lower their risk of getting infected. So the best scenario would be: Stay informed. Be ready to leave the area at the first signs of an outbreak. Start taking Tamiflu and stay on it till you're back home or the outbreak is over. If you can get out of the outbreak area, isolate yourself for a week. Alternatively, if you can't leave follow good preventive medicine precautions. Take Tamiflu as soon as you become ill. Stockpile. Other meds (both those to treat acute illnesses like bacterial pneumonia and as well as your typical chronic disease meds) should also be stockpiled.
What else would you advise?

The use of N-95 respirators for other than medical and first responders is controversial. While respirators and good hand washing will greatly reduce or eliminate the risk of infection it is hard to maintain these practices for extended lengths of time. It takes a LOT of respirators if you are wearing them all day, every day. Finally, if this bug is true to form, it will travel in waves. Any specific location will see cases for about 6 weeks before it burns itself out. If you can hunker down for that long, you may be OK.

The following link will explain what emergency supplies need to be on hand.

Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword?…No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us"
Rom. 8:35, 37.

We serve at His pleasure.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-11-10T08:01:00.000-06:00

I looked and there before me was a great multitude
and no one could count, from every nation, tribe,
people, and language, standing before the throne
and in front of the Lamb.
Rev. 7:9

Africa
by James Reppart

Africa, a land of indescribable beauty! A place that cannot be expressed through the simple words of our language. A land that can only be expressed through one's own experience. A place that will take away your breath, but give you the first real breath of life you have ever drawn into your lungs. A place that will break your heart with the despair and hurt of its people. But a place that will also give your heart strength and endurance through the amazing hope and joyful spirit of the people that inhabit its land. With scenes of God's beautiful creation painted onto a canvas that stretches to the horizon, Africa is by far the most awe inspiring and beautiful artistic expression of our creator. It is this beautiful land that I am privileged to call home.

However, like many of the children of Africa I am not lucky enough to live at home. I am a lost child of Africa. Contrary to my feelings in the past, I no longer despair over the fact that I am no longer living in Africa. For if I had never left, I would never have known how amazing and how much of a blessing it was to have been raised there. Instead, I now see Africa as an amazing place that I wish to share with those that are close to my heart. A place that I hope one day those that I love will be able to experience as I have experienced it. I am thankful for the time I had in Africa, and look forward to and long for the day that I can return. But until then, I will simply remain thankful that I ever had the chance to be there.

James Reppart, 19, is a business major in his sophomore year at York College in York, Nebraska. James grew up in Nairobi, Kenya and Pateras, Washington. He is the son of Jim and Laura Reppart, who lived in Africa 20 years: 4 years in Cameroun and 16 years in Kenya. James states that his outlook of Africa makes him very positive about life. This essay was used with permission by the author.

2005-10-31T10:47:00.000-06:00

WHERE IS HOME
By
Sophia Jenkins

Is it where I was born?

Where grow fields of corn.

Is it where I grew up?

Where I drank tea by the cup.

Is it where I lived for a year?

Where I made friends so dear.

Is it where I moved to?

Where I must begin anew.

It is way up above,

Where in the end I’ll fly to like a dove.

Sophia, lives in Kigali, Rwanda. She recently spent a year with her parents at Oklahoma Christian University where her dad was a Missionary in Residence. Before moving to Oklahoma City, Sophia lived in Kampala, Uganda. Sophia is 13 years old and in the 7th grade. I found her poem stunning. The poem is used with permission.

Yellow Rose
by Miranda Brazle

The beautiful little girl was walking along the stream. Some steps she made were very difficult and she nearly fell. Occasionally she did fall, but she got back up and kept walking. She had fun jumping from one rock to another. It was challenging, yet exciting. Often she stopped to admire the nature around her. She listened to the sound of the water, watched the stream flow, looked up at the trees waving in the wind and bent down to enjoy the smell of the flowers. Her eyes fell on a single yellow rose. She looked around and saw no others. She wondered why this one beautiful yellow rose was so alone. She wondered where its home was. She felt like that rose was made just for her, because that is exactly how she felt. She thought about this as she kept walking. She continued along the path as she had before; jumping with joy, falling and picking herself right back up. She also continued to ponder about this yellow rose she found and what it meant to her. She felt torn between two places; two cultures. She did not belong to either and felt alone, like the rose. She saw other roses along the path, but no yellow ones. She knew there were other people in her life from each culture she grew up with. But none of them grew up with both cultures. She saw red roses and white roses, but none of the people in her life were yellow, like her. She started declaring her thoughts out loud. Her father, who was with her the whole time and had been leading and helping her, intently listened to her. He led her to a field of roses. She saw roses of more colors than she could imagine. There were also yellow roses of different shades of yellow. The different colors made one big beautiful picture. The little girl realized that she did not need to be the same as others to be home. She needed to be with her father in the midst of all of His other beautiful roses.

Miranda Brazle is a student at Oklahoma Christian University in Edmond, Oklahoma. Miranda has lived in Canada, the United States and Belgium, where her parents were missionaries for many years. Miranda attended Flemish speaking schools and is able to speak both Flemish and French. Her essay is used with permission.

Missionary Kids, while feeling at home everywhere and nowhere, learn far sooner than the rest of us where "home" really is. It is way up above where Sophia will fly like a dove and it is holding the Father's hand in Miranda's field of multi-colored roses. It is sometimes feeling all alone. It is sometimes appreciating the beauty of multi-colored humanity. It is falling down and getting up. It all occurs under the scrutiny of a loving Father, who leads, helps, listens and demonstrates his care to us as we walk in wonder and in faith.

Thank you Sophia and Miranda for sharing your thoughts with us all.

2005-10-27T08:30:00.000-05:00

Daughter, your faith has healed you.
Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.
Mark 5:34

Mark 5:25-34 is a story about a sick woman bereft of connections to other people. According to the law, a woman who suffered from a continual discharge of blood, was unclean (Lev. 15:25-30). Any object she touched was unclean. Anyone she touched was unclean. She has spent all her money on physicians trying to find a cure. She is a woman alone and lonely, hopeless and helpless. She is desperate.

This desperate woman hears stories about a man who heals people. If she ventures out to find this man, she will have to be in a crowd – something she is forbidden to do. Everyone who touches her in that crowd will become ceremonially unclean, but the stories about Jesus are compelling. This man comes from God. He can heal. She decides to venture out. She will touch his clothing secretly. No one will know. She will just press through the crowd and touch his garment. That will be enough. She is full of fear, but the hope of healing drives her to try one more time. She presses into the crowd and touches just a small piece of Jesus' clothing. The woman realizes that she is healed, but this Jesus is demanding to know who touched him. She is found out. She falls trembling at his feet. She tells him the whole truth.

At different points in our lives, we all feel as desperate as this woman. We feel alone, lonely, helpless and hopeless. That is when we, like this woman, must kneel and confess to Jesus the whole truth about ourselves. His reply to us is as kind as his answer was to this frightened woman, “Daughter (Son), your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering.” We are restored to a life with God and others. What a glorious gift.

In Jesus' name I pray for all of you who announce the good news of Jesus, that He will bless you, those you love, and those you touch with this same healing message.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-10-21T08:22:00.000-05:00

Praise the Lord, all you nations;
extol Him, all you peoples;
For great is his love towards us,
and the faithfulness of the Lord
endures forever.
Praise the Lord.
Psalm 117

The temperatures have cooled down a bit here in Texas; day light savings time is not yet over, so it is dark when I get up in the morning. The moon has been beautiful the last few days and it is still shining brightly in the darkened sky over Fort Worth at 6:00 a.m. A cup of hot tea, the quiet, and my little courtyard flooded with moonlight have been real blessings to me the last few mornings. This morning I had to wrap myself in a blanket, so cocooned in the early morning darkness, I tried to remember as many of the names of God as I could.

At our Women's Retreat this year, our leader gave us two sheets of paper filled with the different names of God and their meanings. Our assignment was to write a praise to God using each of His names. My first entry was written to Elohim - our creator. By the time I got to the fifth name I was crying and cried through the rest of the exercise. This was a profound spiritual experience for me. Since then I have been trying to learn all the names of God. Not an easy task for me. I only got up to about 14 names this morning. For those who would like to try this exercise, you might want to check out this site. I believe you will discover that our God is truly Elohay Elohim - God of Gods.

2005-10-19T08:15:00.000-05:00

Today would have been my wedding anniversary. On our 40th anniversary around 3 in the afternoon, I remember thinking I'd like to have a party, so sent out a voice mail to all the faculty and staff that they should come by and bring one dinner from the Chinese restaurant to share with everybody else. I think about 70 people showed up. We had containers of Chinese food everywhere. What special times those were! Our children made a big deal out of our 41st wedding anniversary - they knew there might not be any more. It was held in my daughter's house in The Netherlands and all our children and some very special friends were there. Rachel and my other daughter, Reba, had schemed for months on how they were going to pull this off without letting us know. Reba had one suitcase filled with party paraphenalia that she brought from the states for this special occasion. They were successful. It was a total surprise. Rachel's mother-in-law fixed a cake with special candles that when lit acted like sparklers. Special memories. Special children. God has been so good to me!

When our kids were growing up we celebrated every American and every Dutch holiday. We always had some kind of special meal. We carved a jack-o-lantern out of a green melon at Halloween - at that time we didn't have pumpkins in Holland. I remember making boiled eggs look like little toadstools with a tomato end plopped over the top dotted with mayonaise. I may have had more fun than the kids! Traditions hold families together. Delores Curran, author of Traits of a Healthy Family, states that the healthy family has a strong sense of family in which rituals and traditions abound (p. 199). Some of the hallmarks are 1)the family treasures its legends and characters; 2) the family has a person and/or place that serves as a locus; 3) the family makes a conscious effort to gather as a people; 4)the family views itself as a link between the past and the future; and 6) the family cherishes its traditions and rituals (p 216).

Missionary families who are more mobile than most and who do not intend to stay forever in the land of their chosen country, need to take special care that they establish a strong sense of family. Establish traditions that can be carried on anywhere. Like the children of Israel, we need markers of remembrance to give us hope. When my son died, what held us together was remembering the special times we celebrated together. We found ourselves laughing and crying remembering special times. "Hope is what we need so badly, and hope is based in the memory. Rituals do so much to feed the hope through memory. And hope is the travel virtue - it gets us from yesterday into today and gives us the courage to face tomorrow. Rituals and traditions are much more than words. They give those who participate in them an opportunity to say nonverbally, "I love you. I like being with you. I want to reenact what's important in life with you because you are important to me" (p. 211, 212).

2005-10-18T08:49:00.000-05:00

Then God said, "Let us make man in
our image, in our likeness..."
Gen. 1:26
The Lord God said, "It is not good
for man to be alone. I will make a
helper suitable for him..."
Gen. 2:18

I am unable to understand how our God is one - ("Hear oh Israel, the Lord our God is one God") and also Father and Son and Holy Spirit. But this God said, "Let us make man in our image." Because I am made in the image of a God, who is One and who is also us and our, I know I need connections with others to be complete. Connections with others seems to be a basic need.

The rising rates of depression, anxiety, attention deficit, conduct disorders, suicide ideation, and other forms of mental and emotional distress among children and adolescents was the impetuous behind a study by the Commission on Children at Risk, A Report to the Nation, Hardwired to Connect: The New Scientific Case for Authoritative Communities. So what is their solution to this growing problem? It is people helping children and youth connect to others through authoritative communities, i.e., groups of people who are committed to one another over time and who model and pass on at least part of what it means to be a good person and live a good life (p. 14).

The Commission on Children at Risk, made up of 33 children's doctors, research scientists, and mental health and youth service professionals, came to the conclusion, after studying numerous other research studies, that human beings are hardwired to connect with other human beings. They came up with ten main planks to bolster their case for authoritative communities:

1) The mechanisms by which we become and stay attached to others are biologically primed and increasingly desirable in the basic structure of the brain.
2) Nurturing environments, or the lack of them, affect gene transcription and the development of brain circuitry.
3) The old "nature versus nurture" debate - focusing on whether heredity or environment is the main determinant of human conduct - is no longer relevant to serious discussions of child well-being and youth programming.
4) Adolescent risk-taking and novelty-seeking are connected to changes in brain structure and function.
5) Assigning meaning to gender in childhood and adolescence is a human universal that deeply influences well-being.
6) The beginning of morality is the biologically primed moralization of attachment.
7) The ongoing development of morality in later childhood and adolescence involves the human capacity to idealize individuals and ideas.
8) Primary nurturing relationships influence early spiritual development - call it the spiritualization of attachment - and spiritual development can influence us biologically in the same ways that primary nurturing relationships do.
9) Religiosity and spirituality significantly influence well-being.
10) The human brain appears to be organized to ask ultimate questions and seek ultimate answers (p. 15)

I leave you to peruse the research yourself and come to your own conclusions. I do want to point out some things that seem to click in my own mind about this subject. God put us in community when he established marriage, family, and church. Larry Crabb believes that the purpose of community is "to connect with people, to help them put to death their bad urges, to exercise self-control over unruly and immoral passions, especially during those seasons in the desert, those long nights of darkness, those surprising encounters with seemingly pointless difficulties, and those humbling moments when we see the damage our selfishness has caused someone else"(p.149)..."connecting begins when we enter into someone else's battle to experience God with the empathy of a fellow struggler and the faith to know it can happen" (p. 151). He also says that "our fiercest battles are fought when we seek with all our hearts to trust God so fully that we see every misfortune as something he [God] permits and wants to use, to know him so richly that we turn to no one and nothing else to experience what our souls long to enjoy, to love him so completely and with such consuming passion that we hate anything that comes between us and eagerly give it up. That's a battle I cannot win alone" (p. 150 from Connecting: A Radical New Vision. Neither Larry Crabb, nor I, nor anyone else can win this battle alone. We all need a Christ-following community that is waging the same war and will include us in the fight. I'm grateful to all those, both past and present, who have waged war with and for me.

Every person needs the kind of connection Larry Crabb describes, but what about all those children and adolescents out there who need this kind of connection and can't find it? What about all those adults out there who need this as well? Can we overcome our ingrained western cultural beliefs that "people prefer to be alone and want to take care of their own problems" themselves? We advise foreigners, who may be desparately lonely, to not seem too needy around Americans because that will cause them to back off from having a relationship with them. I warn missionaries and MKs who have acculturated to more community oriented cultures of the same thing (p. 12 from American Ways: A Guide to Foreigners in the United States by Gary Althen). One person alone cannot do it. But the community of Christ can, if we really want to. We can do it if we really do attempt to follow the first and second greatest commandments while carrying out the great commission. We can do it if we decide we are "our brother's keeper."

God loves the orphan and the widow and the foreigner in the land and I think He loves the socially unskilled who don't know how to get connected. He loves the floundering people in our society. He loves the children mothers and dads neglect. Would to God we could love this fragmented, disconnected generation like He does.

2005-10-06T08:59:00.000-05:00

The purposes of a man's heart
are deep waters,
but a man of understanding draws
them out.
Proverbs 20:5

Let the peace of Christ rule in
your hearts,
since as members of one body,
you have been called to peace.
Col. 3:15

Last week I participated in a Mediation Practicum from PeaceMakers International. It began as a self-study course which consisted of reading two books, working through a manual and listening to 8 tapes. The books were a joy to read. I had already read Peacemakers by Ken Sande, a book describing and prescribing biblical reconciliation. I wish I could have read the second book when I was 25 - maybe I would have made fewer mistakes along the way. I consider it a life-changing book. All my kids are getting a copy for Christmas. The book is called Instruments in the Redeemer's Hands: People Needing Change Helping People Needing Change by Paul Tripp. This book affirmed some of the things I began thinking about a year ago this month when I attended Larry Crabb's School of Spiritual Direction i.e., Christians need to have meaningful connections with other Christians - they need safe places to be. Two other good books for you to consider are Larry Crabb's The Safest Place on Earth: Where People Connect and Are Changed Forever and Connections: Healing for Ourselves and Our Relationships. I'll blog about the research on connection next time.

The practicum was all hands-on-work: role playing exercises for two days. Every 8 people had a mentor. We sat at tables of four so each mentor assisted two tables. The mentors were amazing! They were in one sense also theologians – though they had many different occupations. The mentors came from all walks of life: counselors, lawyers, ministers, teachers, etc. My mentor was a career reserve military officer and lawyer. These mentors were skilled mediators and had about 1500 scriptures in their heads which they could apply to peace making situations at a moment’s notice.

After one day of working with us, the mentors knew pretty well who to hand what role to whom to play the next day. In the morning session I was one of the persons who needed help with reconciliation. In the afternoon I was the mediator. We had to come to the practicum in role – couldn’t even break from our roles during break. My morning role play fit me to a T. I didn’t have to role play. I was myself. (Of course, I know that in any role play, we become ourselves anyway – but all I did was change the name on my name tag.)

Peacemakers International uses the biblical method for reconciliation/peacemaking. If a person is in the wrong, scripture is used with that person to point out their idols, those things in a person’s life that a person (most often unknowingly) uses as substitutions for God – the things that are hindering their relationship with God and neighbor. These idols are pointed out privately in caucus. Caucuses are called when needed. I am totally impressed with this method of helping people find peace with God and their neighbor. I had a few "aha" moments myself during role plays. God's word is like a two edged sword and is useful for rebuking and correcting and training (Heb. 4:12; 2 Tim 3:16) even when we are playing a role.

After the practicum I attended the Peacemaker International Conference and enrolled in the Cross-Cultural track. There were four sessions a day for two days and much of this track was on missions and reconciliation. As a missionary care worker I think it is vital that our mission teams/missionary families be trained in peacemaking skills before they leave for the mission field. Conflict with other missionaries on the field is a major concern. Lesley Moore (ACU Master's Thesis) found that the number one problem for Church of Christ missionaries on the field was other missionaries. A study by Ed Matthews, ACU Bible and Missions professor, encompassed 42 teams from Churches of Christ on four continents. Sadly 55 percent of Ed’s respondents reported that conflict resolution was either omitted or ineffective in their team formation training. Ninety three percent of his respondents stated that interpersonal relations was (or would have been) the most helpful thing in their mission preparation.

Cross cultural peace making is the latest area added to Peacemaker International's offerings. This ministry is already heavily involved in personal, church, and marriage reconciliation. If you get a chance to attend any of these sessions please do so. Peace making workshops are being offered around the world and you missionaries out there could be very helpful to this organization by helping them understand how to use the biblical methods of peace making in your adopted culture. They are looking for help. If nothing else, order the books I mentioned. You will find them very helpful.

Stay involved in the word and with the Word. Keep on keeping on, dear ones.
Peace and...

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-09-27T11:14:00.000-05:00

Be very careful, then, how you live -
not as unwise but as wise,
making the most of every opportunity,
because the days are evil.
Eph. 5:15, 16.

Today I want to ask each of you to read Mike Cope's blog. Mike's comments today concern a book he is reading by Carl Honore, In Praise of Slowness. I direct you to his comments page, as well, since there Mike posted an essay by Barbara Brown Taylor on Sabbath Resistance.

I learned the value of slowing down from Richard Foster's books, Celebration of Discipline and The Freedom of Simplicity. Foster says,

Many of us would find great relief in discovering our own cycles of activity and quiet. For example, I function best when I alternate between periods of intense activity and of comparative solitude. When I understand this about myself I can order my life accordingly. After a certain amount of immersion in public life, I begin to burn out. And I have noticed that I burn out inwardly before I do outwardly. Hence, I must be careful not to become frantic bundle of hollow energy, busy among people but devoid of life. I must learn when to retreat, like Jesus, and experience the recreating power of God. We are told that Peter tarried in Joppa for many days with one Simon, a tanner (Acts 9:43). And along our journey we need to discover numerous "tarrying places" where we can receive heavenly manna (Freedom of Simplicity, p. 91).

Everyone talks about having less time with their spouse and children, but it seems to be an unsolvable problem. Ten or more years ago Dr. David Elkind addressed the problem in two books: The Hurried Child and All Grown Up and No Place to Go. The cartoon of two children looking into their Daytimers deciding that next Saturday between 1:00 p.m. and 1:30 p.m. they could meet to play, isn't really very funny.

This lack of family time is a reentry issue all missionary families face. Families do have less time with each other in the U.S. than in other parts of the world, except possibly Japan. Returning/furloughing missionaries need to find a good mentor to help them while they adjust to new situations. This mentor should be able to inform them about the school systems and children's activities that are available, but at some point the family needs to decide about their use of time.

Somewhere Richard Foster states that there is no law that requires us to answer the phone. When I had a land-line phone I had an answering machine. My message stated, "We don't answer the phone. Please leave a message." I didn't promise to call back. It was amazing how well that worked.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-09-22T08:36:00.000-05:00

You are my God,
and I will give you thanks;
You are my God,
and I will thank you.

Give thanks to the Lord,
for he is good;
his love endures forever.
Psalms 118: 28, 29

The Families in Global Transition's conference was wonderful. Part of that wonderfulness came from being with people with whom you have so much in common. So thank you, Joyce Blake, for putting together such a wonderful, full-of-information and practical-tips-filled conference for us all. The next conference will be in March, 2007, in Houston. I attended the pre-conference workshop on catching the dream when you've lived so much of your life in transition. I plan to share it with a new adult MK friend of mine, who for no specific reason is itching to move again - move anywhere - because it doesn't feel right to be in one place for very long. I also attended Ruth Van Reken's session on Third Culture Kids: Prototypes for Understanding Other Cross Cultural Kids. I had heard some of her material before at the Mental Health and Missions conference in Indiana last year, but she has added some important data to her presentation. Ruth has come up with a Cross-Cultural Kids (CCKs) Model. CCKs are 1) traditional TCKs; 2) Children of Bi-multi-cultural Parents; 3) Children of Immigrants; 4) Children of Refugees; 5) Children of Minorities; 6) International Adoptees; and 7) "Domestic" MKs. This last category is interesting. Domestic MKs are children whose parents have moved in or among various subcultures within the child's home country. Children can find themselves in more than one category, e.g. I know several bi-multi-cultural couples who have international adoptee children.

I find Ruth's work and Barbara Schaetti's research (applying minority identification theory to TCK identity theory) fascinating. I would like to take time someday to investigate how Terry LaFramboise studies of minority acculturation fit MKs and TCAs (Third Culture Adults). Each of these groups that Ruth has called CCKs all experience cycles of mobility, differing socio-economic factors, hidden losses and benefits/challenges similar to traditional third culture communities. The TCK research can be applied to CCKs. Mary Pipher, touches on many of these CCK issues in her book, In the Middle of Everywhere. If you haven't read this book, then please do. I think every new church planter should read this book.

At the conference I also viewed a 90 minute film on military brats. I emailed the contact at the web-site yesterday to see if the film is available for purchase. In grad school I took an independent study on the military family - military brats are considered TCKs. When military brats turn 18 they are on their own - no more privileges (read Conway's The Great Santini). Since the time I studied military families to now, there have been a number of positive changes. A large contingent of DOD employees attended the FIGT conference whose only purpose is to help the families of military personnel with any need they have. My prayer is that the church will continue to make the same kinds of improvements in caring for her warrior families.

Hurricane Rita seems to be heading straight for the Texas coast. At the moment it is a force 5 hurricane. A million+ evacuees are leaving the Texas coastal areas. There are no motel/hotel rooms left within 150 miles of the metro-plex. Tarrant county churches are opening up their buildings to these evacuees. On the big signs on the interstate which warn motorists of up-coming accidents/road work and of Amber-alerts, a phone number is displayed for evacuees to call who need a place to stay. It is estimated that an additional 15,000+ people have come to the metro-plex for shelter. This is on top of the 30,000+ evacuees housed here from hurricane Katrina.

Please remember evacuees when you pray. These are the victims of catastrophes of major proportions. Pray that Christians will continue to respond personally and corporately with generosity to this great need. The need will continue to be with us for the next several years. All the needs of the tsunami victims have not been met yet either. Pray that evacuees will look to God as their strength and support. Regardless of what happens in this life we need to remember:

Now all has been heard;
here is the conclusion of the matter:
Fear God and keep his commandments,
for this is the whole duty of man
(Ecclesiastes 12:13 NIV).

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-09-13T10:43:00.000-05:00

Friends everywhere, roots nowhere, loving places you don't belong, belonging to places you don't love, hating the thought of one more good-bye, afraid to make friends, afraid to lose friends, afraid to love, needing to love and be loved.
Source: Andy, ATCK

Tomorrow I travel to Houston to attend the Families in Global Transition conference. I will be participating in the pre-conference workshop, ATCK Trauma: Recovery into Triumph. I had to put down two choices, so if that workshop is full, will be redirected to To Catch a Dream: Pursuing Your Passion in a Transient World. Either workshop will be helpful to me.

ATCKs often feel like they are pursuing life with the Navajo dream catcher. They sometimes struggle in special ways. A TCK is a third culture kid. In their book, The Third Culture Kid Experience: Growing Up among Worlds, David Pollock and Ruth van Reken came up with a good definition for this term first used by Ruth Hill Useem, a former professor at Michigan State.

A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is a person who has spent a significant part of his or her developmental years outside the parents' culture. The TCK builds relationships to all of the cultures, while not having full ownership in any. Although elements from each culture are assimilated into the TCK's life experience, the sense of belonging is in relationship to others of similar background.

An ATCK is an adult third culture kid. Missionary kids are TCKs.

Those of us who are adults who chose to live in a foreign culture, learn new languages and customs can consider ourselves bi-cultural - tri-cultural, and so forth. Our children, who had no choice, but who never-the-less grew up in another culture, are third culture kids. TCKs feel different from everyone else, never quite fitting in. Their parents may have returned to the States and are now considered former expatriates. But third-culture kids can never say they are former third-culture kids. They will always be hybrids, the offspring of two cultures. They think differently. They act differently. And they are different in the way they are put together. These differences are very real, regardless of how much they might try to act like the mono-cultural children around them.

In spite of any personal difficulties, I've never known a TCK regret being third culture. They would not trade their experiences for anything. It seems to me that Adult Missionary Kids often have a world view that is inclusive; they seem to care about all kinds of people groups. MK/TCKs gravitate toward minority groups (afterall - they are a minority); toward foreigners, toward the disenfranchised and toward other MK/TCKs. That seems Christ-like to me. MK/TCKs have much to teach us.

2005-09-08T09:29:00.000-05:00

She promised them we would pray.
Won't you join me in this endeavor?

I was listening to NPR on the way home last night and heard how the nations of the world are opening up their hearts and pocket books to us. Can you imagine? Scri Lanka is sending us $25,000.00 and Croatia is sending us $6,000.00. Some of the poorest countries in the world are being incredibly generous. I listened to Canada's ambassador to the U.S. offering us everything they have - electrical power, oil, ships, forensic experts - anything we could want. We just need to let them know what we need - neighbor helping neighbor!

Three thoughts:

1) When we give, God looks at what we have left over - not the amount we gave. God, please bless these generous, poor nations as you blessed the widow who gave her last mite.

2) Other nations saw our brokenness in not being able to respond quickly and it broke their hearts to see the incredible human suffering caused by Katrina. Any thoughts about brokenness being more powerful than pride?

3) The earth groans waiting for its redemption.

Suffering is on my mind today. A little book, put together in Africa for African Christians who live with trauma, that you might find useful, is called Mourning into Dancing: Trauma Healing for the Suffering Church. The book and training on how to use of the book is a project of Wycliffe and the Reformed Church of America. I think this little book would be relevant to us in the states right now. U.S. Christians need a more developed theology of suffering - my opinion.

A verse (Romans 8:28) I had a hard time dealing with, especially after Paul died - people quoted it to me to be comforting - it never was - is a verse I now cherish, but I take it in the context of the rest of chapter 8, i.e., nothing can separate us from the love of God. We tend to forget verse 29 - that we were predestined to conform to the likeness of his son. If we will allow it, suffering can make us more like Jesus. I still wouldn't recommend Rom 8:28 be quoted to Katrina victims.

A verse that has comforted me when Rom 8:28 didn't, will hopefully comfort you today.

Psalm 46:1-3:

"God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
Therefore we will not fear,
though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the sea,
though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging."

Pray for Katrina victims, the rest of the suffering world and for the nations. The Lord God reigns. Maranatha!

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-09-07T13:53:00.000-05:00

Let the little children come to me,
and do not hinder them,
for the kingdom of God
belongs to such as these.
Mark 10:14

A book profiled in the latest Christian Chronicle (September 2005) caught my attention this morning. The book, Long Distance Grandma: Staying Connected Across the Miles, by Janet Teitsort is available from Howard Publishing. I wish I had known of resources like these when my two older grandchildren were young. I can still profit from this book since my youngest, soon-to-be 3 year-old grandchild lives in The Netherlands - quite a distance from her American Oma. (She's coming to the states for the first time for Christmas this year. I'm a happy grandma!)

Some other recommendations for ideas to strengthen child/father and child/mother relationships from a distance are two activity books put out by the National Institute for Building Long Distance Relationships. Publishers are A & E Family Publishers and the ISBN numbers are 0967359953 and 0967359961 respectively. The ideas in these latter two books could also be adapted to long-distance grandparenting.

Missionary moms and dads may want to look at these books, also, since many of you have sent your children back to the states to college. Teitsort has ideas on how to stay connected to your kids in college. Some of your children married and had children here and you stayed on the field. You have become long distance grandparents and now you understand what your parents gave up when they didn't discourage you from heeding God's call. Or you may be like me. For one of my children, "home" seemed to be more there than here.

Whatever the case, bridging the distance is important, no matter the age of the child, which reminds me, I need to call my daughter.

Love's prayers,

Dottie

2005-08-31T10:30:00.000-05:00

Cross-cultural training should be a must prior to any assignment no matter how 'easy' the expat thinks it will be. The head organizational psychologist for a G7 country's foreign service recently determined the highest degree of cross-cultural misunderstandings occurred in missions where the local population spoke English well. In other words: the greatest threat came not from the culture that was the most 'foreign', but from the one that was the most similar.
Source: Cross-Cultural Training for US Relocations, Robin Pascoe, www.expatexpert.com, December 2004

Those familiar with David Hackett Fischer's book, Albion's Seed, will understand that even moving from one region in the United States to another can cause a surprising case of culture shock. Fischer divides the U.S.into seven cultural regions: 1)The Northern Tier, which includes New England, the old northwest, the northern plains and the Pacific Northwest; 2) Greater New York; 3) Midland America, which extends from Pennsylvania west through the Ohio valley and the middle west to the Rocky Mountains; 4) The Great Basin, which includes a predominantly Mormon Culture in Utah and parts of Idaho, Nevada, Arizona, Colorado and Wyoming; 5) The Coastal South, that extends from coastal Maryland to the Texas coast near Houston; 6) The Southern Highlands, which includes Appalachia, the old southwest, the Ozark Plateau, and much of Texas and Oklahoma; and 7) Southern California.

I will celebrate one year working at Missions Resource Network tomorrow. Early on in my new work, I was reviewing and writing about culture shock and realized I was experiencing what I was writing about. I immediately thought of Fischer's book and reread his last section. Though this is a pill of a book, I highly recommend it to you. When I read his section on the borderers, it helped me understand more about the cultural side of the Restoration Movement.

I've said all of this to say, that adjusting to a very similar culture is hard work. I remember too well my first two years of adjustment to living in Amsterdam. However, imperceptibly over the next 15 years my way of thinking changed. I had no idea how much until I moved back to the states. I have since found by experience and by looking at the research that re-adjustment is often harder for expatriates returning from more westernized cultures like Europe or South America. Some cultures won't allow us to sink into their culture. We are always reminded that we are different. But I must quickly add, reentry is hard on anyone who has embedded him/herself into another culture - regardless. I will also add that it is not the amount of time spent on the field either. It is how embedded the expatriate was in the host culture.

Regardless of where we live, the most important cultural adjustment any of us need to make is the one we make when we follow Jesus. Our citizenship is not here. In order to make those imperceptible and intentional changes in our value system, we must keep our eyes on Jesus and be rooted in Him. I like Hauerwas' phraseology: Christians are resident aliens.

Love's prayers...Dottie

2005-08-30T14:33:00.000-05:00

For one human being to love another: That is perhaps, the most difficult of all our tasks, the ultimate, the last test and proof, the work for which all other work is but preparation.
Rainer Maria Rilke

Dear children, let us not love with words or tongue but with actions and in truth.
I John 3:18

Dr. Dale Hawley, my associate at MRN and grad professor at University of Wisconsin-Stout, put together a critical review of the literature on missionary kids and families for MRN sometime in the recent past. This review, along with 100s of other articles will be placed on the MRN website in the near future. I'll inform you when that great article-launching-day arrives.

In a nutshell some of the things Dale found out were that missionary kids do well when they see their dads in a positive light, when they understand and identify with their parents' mission, and when the family practiced the spiritual discipline of prayer within the home. Strong family relationships seem to be the key to healthy adjustment - whether on the field - in transition - or when missionaries return "home." Children need to have deep roots before they can grow wings.

2005-08-29T13:16:00.000-05:00

Life does not accommodate you,
it shatters you...
Every seed destroys its container or else
there would be no fruition.
Florida Scott-Maxwell

Thanks to Nancy Hartman's (good friend at OC) recommendation I have begun reading a new series of books by William Bridges, who has authored several books on transitions with business applications. I'm reading two of his more generic books: 1) Transitions and 2) The Way of Transition: Embracing Life's Most Difficult Moments. There are so many ways to apply Bridges' material to the missionary experience, for what is the missionary's life but one transition after another. Bridges wrote The Way of Transition after the death of his wife.

As a person who has taught many a course over the last 20 years on human development, Bridges' statement that the stages in our lives are just the resting places between transitions rang so true to me. The transitions are where we develop our character. This has been true for me personally. I suppose some of my bigger transitions, besides marriage and motherhood, and the empty nest, were entry into a new culture and going through the frustration of what is called culture shock, only to find that reentry to my "home" culture was 10 times more difficult than entry into my "host" country had ever been. I suppose the hardest transition for me was the death of my son. That sent me on a God-hunt that has basically formed who I am today. I had eleven years to get ready for the death of my husband. In a sense mourning took place almost every day. Will this be his last birthday? Will this be our last anniversary? Will this be our last vacation? After Tom's death there really was no more, but I didn't go into the deep depression like I did when Paul was killed. I wondered why. I've basically come to the conclusion that God had already broken me. He didn't need to break me any more. Also, I had formed a pretty good theology of suffering. I had learned to be thankful - even for the smallest blessing. I appreciated every moment I had with Tom. What also helped was that Tom never stopped being a spiritual leader to me, whether by word or example. I was exceedingly blessed to be his wife.

Missionary transitions have everything to do with relationships - with being connected. Until we traverse "entry" into a new culture and "reentry" into our "home" culture, we are people estranged from others who think like we think, feel like we feel, dream what we dream and affirm what we affirm. For those non-missionaries reading this and wondering "what's the big deal" go to TCKWorld.com and read the story of Mr. Round Head. That might help a little bit.

Transitions make us form/transform our identity. That identity will be uniquely yours as mine is uniquely mine, but those who have been through the same transitions, identify with each other, regardless of how different we are from each other. I recommend William Bridges' books to you.

2005-08-18T12:06:00.000-05:00

Taste and see that the Lord is good;
blessed is the man who takes refuge
in him.

Children love their daddys. Although dads provide less basic care, dads tend to play more. Dad's play is noisier and more boisterous than mom's play. Dad's tend to invent new and exciting ways to interact with their children. When young children are placed in a strange situation and both mom and dad are present, children look to their dads for cues on whether to venture out or not.
In some parts of the world when evening comes missionary moms and dads and children are together at home, sometimes with no television. In these situations families make their own fun. In other parts of the world, evening is the best time for missionary dads to study with others. Whatever kind of culture you find yourself in, dads should never underestimate their importance to the family. Fathers are to nurture their children. They are not to exasperate their children (Eph. 6:4). Nurture is a male characteristic for Christian fathers. Here is a link to a web-site (http://www.smartfamilies.com) that offers dad's some hints on how to interact with their children. Some of the ideas may be too American to apply where you live, but missionaries are resourceful people. You will probably get a few ideas that you can use or adapt. Blessings and love's prayers to all the missionary dads out there...Dottie

2005-08-17T12:26:00.000-05:00

I will extol the Lord at all times,
his praise will always be on my lips,
My soul will boast in the Lord;
let the afflicted hear and rejoice,
Glorify the Lord with me;
let us exalt His name together.

Developmental psychologists look at moms and try to figure out what kind of mom is the best kind of mom. One study looked at children in kindergarten who seemed to have it together. They interviewed all the moms and then matched them to the children. They dubbed the mom's of the children who had good self esteem the '30 second moms.' These moms did their own thing, but if the child needed them, they stopped everything and concentrated completely on the child. When the problem was solved, these moms went back to what they were doing. The moms of the children who seemed to lack good self esteem were the 'hover' moms and the neglectful moms. Moms who hover over their children all the time or those moms who were there phsically, but who were not there psychologically for their children, had children who were clingy and unable to do for themselves.
I know you missionary moms have tons to do, but take out those 30 seconds throughout the day to be there totally for your children. It will pay rich dividends.

Missionary's Missionary

2005-08-15T17:26:00.000-05:00

Well, I've succumbed to the world of blogging with my boss's blessing! This blog will be about missionary care and I will probably throw in an opinion or two along the way or brag on my grandchildren. I want this blog to be helpful to missionaries, but also helpful to the mission committees and churches who send missionaries to the field.

About 29 percent of North American missionaries return home each year for non-preventable reasons. That leaves 71 percent, who had they received some TLC - good missionary care - could have remained on the field a bit longer. Reasons for preventable attrition were 1) marriage and family reasons; 2) agency reasons (translated to my fellowship - eldership and mission committee reasons); 3) personal reasons; 4) team reasons; 5) cultural reasons; and 6) work related reasons. So, I will probably spend time talking about each one of these areas.

I will also post news items or helpful links that might be helpful to missionaries as I learn about them. My web page is www.MRNet.org. Check it out.

Love's prayers....Dottie